“I got a little short with her and flat out told her that we are fine helping her, but we aren’t her kids father.”
Cravings during pregnancy are common and can vary from person to person. Pregnant women may develop intense desires for specific foods or combinations of flavors that they wouldn’t normally consume.
While the exact cause of cravings is not fully understood, hormonal changes, nutritional needs, and psychological factors are believed to play a big role. This story is about cravings during pregnancy but also boundaries and respect.
The OP’s sister-in-law, who is six months pregnant, has moved in with them due to financial constraints and high-risk pregnancy. Despite their strained relationship, the OP and her husband decided to provide her with all support she needed.
They don’t charge her rent, and the OP takes care of cooking and groceries in the household. However, a conflict has appeared over food preferences and cravings.
The OP and her spouse prioritize a healthy lifestyle and limit the presence of junk food in the house. They occasionally indulge in treats, but not excessively.
The OP’s SIL, on the other hand, constantly requests junk food due to her pregnancy cravings. But the OP hesitates to spend money on food that only her SIL would eat, especially considering their financial situation.
The OP also doesn’t want her children to question why SIL can have certain foods that they can’t. Additionally, SIL’s requests for specific meals due to pregnancy-related nausea create difficulty in satisfying everyone’s preferences.
Recently, SIL expressed dissatisfaction with the available food, declined the meals prepared by the OP, and even asked the OP to fetch her something from the store or DQ.
Frustrated, the OP firmly stated that while they are willing to help, they cannot cater to her every demand simply because she is pregnant. This confrontation left SIL in tears, and the OP’s spouse feels caught in the middle of the situation.
The OP asks:
The OP explained why they took her SIL into their home:
The OP said they don’t like junk food and prefer healthier meal option:
But her SIL craves junk food due to her pregnancy:
The OP wants to help her SIL as much as she can, but buying her junk food or cooking different meals for her is just too much:
Recently, the SIL had silly expectations from the OP:
So, the OP snapped at her and made her cry:
“Cravings are not necessities- they are wants.”
“No one ever died from not satisfying a craving”
“She needs to stop being a choosing beggar”
“Seems like you are doing more than the kids’ father.”
“You’ve done a lot by allowing her to live in your home”
One Redditor was curious:
And the OP responded:
The OP’s perspective is understandable and valid. While it is important to support pregnant individuals and accommodate their needs, there should also be a mutual understanding and respect for the household dynamics and financial limitations. The OP and her spouse have already gone above and beyond by providing her SIL a place to stay without charging rent and taking care of the groceries.
The SIL should appreciate it more.
