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AITA for not turning my alarm off so my BF can sleep?

by John Doe
April 20, 2026
in Aita
Reading Time: 6 mins read
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They had built a fragile harmony in their small, shared space—a one-bedroom apartment where dreams of morning runs and quiet rest intertwined with the harsh reality of conflicting schedules. Each morning’s alarm was supposed to signal a fresh start, but now it had become a source of tension, waking him from precious sleep and stirring silent resentment between two people trying to coexist.

Caught between her need for routine and his desperate need for rest, their love was tested by the cruel demands of time and circumstance. The couch became more than just furniture; it was a symbol of their struggle to find balance, comfort, and understanding in a life that refused to pause.

AITA for not turning my alarm off so my BF can sleep?

Me and my BF moved in together a few months...

It's not possible for us to do this another time,...

BF's job doesn't have standard hours, right now he has...

My alarm doesn't usually clash with anything because he's either...

By the time he gets home from those and sleeps...

I said he can go back to sleep after, but...

He wants me to turn the alarm off entirely. I...

A home is supposed to be a place of rest and happiness. But when space is tight, small habits can cause big arguments.

One person is trying to stay healthy by running with friends. The other person is exhausted from working late and needs to sleep. A simple alarm clock is now making both of them feel frustrated and unheard.

Dr. John Gottman, a clinical psychologist, explains that many relationship problems are based on different lifestyles. In this case, the two people have very different work and sleep schedules. The boyfriend needs sleep to stay healthy and do his job, while the narrator wants to keep a consistent exercise routine. Because they live in a one-bedroom apartment, these two needs are clashing.

The narrator is focusing on their own routine, but sleep deprivation is a serious issue for the boyfriend. The current situation shows that neither person is willing to change their habits to help the other. This lack of compromise can lead to anger and long-term problems in the relationship.

I recommend that the narrator tries a different kind of alarm, such as a vibrating watch that is strong enough to wake them up without noise. They should also agree to a compromise on the two days when the boyfriend works late. For example, the narrator could skip the run or exercise at a different time on those specific days. Working together to find a solution is better than insisting on one person’s way.

What do you think of this story?





THIS STORY SHOOK THE INTERNET – AND REDDITORS DIDN’T HOLD BACK.

Pale-Mammoth-9340 YTA

**Edit: I just saw another reply from OP when someone asked what her BF’s job is, and she said air traffic controller. I’m doubling down on my YTA.

You're 1000% the AH.**

**I’m an air traffic controller and let me tell you, rest is extremely important. Extremely. We are literally communicating and making sure all of you are safe while flying.

One wrong move from an air traffic controller can have...

**I suggest you read** [this article about flight 3352.](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Aeroflot_Flight_3352) **178 people died largely because an air traffic controller fell asleep on the job.**

Might be an unpopular judgement but here are my reasons (italics are comments from OP):

*Yes he’s tried earplugs but he can still hear the alarm. It’s kind of important for me to keep the alarm so I can actually stick to the routine.

Right now I'm only actually waking up early to run...

*Also he gets multiple breaks during his shifts, but he said that’s different and he needs to be rested well before he goes*

He’s already using earplugs and it’s not working.

Might be because he's a light sleeper or the alarm...

Even from the main post, it says "I can **try**...

So you’re waking your BF up but not getting up yourself.

It's also not every day, just the 2 days he...

Intrepid_Potential60 How about YOU sleep on the couch those days?...

roxysinsox YTA

Why is it OK to tell him to sleep on the couch when you could sleep on the couch as well? I assume neither of you wants to do that? He said no and you don’t want to either? But also, shift work is rough.

Maybe boyfriend could sleep with earplugs in? I do this...

Edited to add: You're absolutely the a*shole after all of...

takatine YTA. Your bf is an AIR TRAFFIC CONTROLLER, he's...

It's his JOB. YOU sleep on the couch. You're not...

Dcc456 YTA simply because you don't even get up at...

I get so frustrated on our days off when my...

Now, I'm not saying either of you should sleep on...

Maybe set it to vibrate and put it under your...

Final comment: if it's taken you months to create a...

ETA: you purposely left out a bunch of vital info...

PlanktonOk4846 YTA you can skip the run 2 days per...

Look, his sleep was already a higher priority than your...

PsiBlaze YTA You want to run. How nice. He wants...

The narrator feels that their morning exercise is a vital part of their health and social life. At the same time, the partner needs uninterrupted sleep to recover from irregular work shifts. This creates a conflict between one person’s routine and the other person’s physical need for rest in a small apartment.

Is it more important for one partner to keep their healthy morning routine, or should they stop their routine to make sure the other partner gets enough sleep?

John Doe

John is a seasoned writer with a passion for storytelling and technology.

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