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AITA for refusing to watch my grandchildren overnight twice a week

by Ankit
September 14, 2025
in Aita
Reading Time: 9 mins read
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A grandmother’s heart is stretched thin, caught between the love for her seven grandchildren and the urgent need for her own freedom. Having raised her own children with little support, she now faces the overwhelming reality of caring for a growing family, yearning to reclaim time for herself and her dreams.

Despite her deep devotion, the weight of constant caregiving threatens to consume her spirit. She longs to explore the world and nurture her career, but the demands of her children’s requests pull her back, leaving her torn between sacrifice and self-preservation.

AITA for refusing to watch my grandchildren overnight twice a week

I have 3 children, 30m, 28f and 20f. My son...

When my oldest grandchild turned 1 I'd occasionally have him...

Then as more came along I'd watch them too but...

watching them in groups of 2-4 once a week or...

my parents refused to help raise my children apart from...

children.

I've told my children on several occasions that I don't...

also finally work on my career. I always take my...

children and their partners out once a week for a...

Today my 3 children came over together and told me...

They've asked that I watch all the children every Friday...

I told them no, watching all 7 children is exhausting...

bathed and into bed. As a compromise I said I'd...

They're not happy at this at all. They said as...

I already help out financially by paying for each grandchild...

I understand my children are probably stressed from dealing with...

few months but am I such a horrible person for...

I'll also add that they've all admitted they aren't done...

increase Edit: thank you everyone for your comments. I've responded...

You've all been very kind and thank you for the...

I've sent the link to my children to this for...

I also told them in a group chat that going...

There's so many comments that I don't know if I'll...

First of all he thinks you're all a bunch of...

He's read lots of your replies and has had to...

I said to him who else am I supposed to...

He said him and his sisters are at breaking point...

Apparently I've no idea what it's like having to be...

I tried telling him lockdown wasn't exactly a picnic for...

He again said if I missed them so much I'd...

I told him I had infact realised what I was...

I told him I was done being an unpaid childminder...

hours so I get to know them rather than spending...

I reminded him exactly what I had given up to...

I told him I'll pay for one activity a month...

On his way out he kicked one of my plantpots...

I'll need to talk to my daughter's too about it...

I also let him know he was an idiot for...

Part of me feels good that I stood up for...

I'm going to use some of my savings and book...

What do you think of this story?





AFTER THIS STORY DROPPED, REDDIT WENT INTO MELTDOWN MODE – CHECK OUT WHAT PEOPLE SAID.

stuckhans Why not have them watch each others kids, on...

ChemMJW They are just as qualified as watching kids as...

Your grandchildren are the responsibility of their parents, not your...

From what you say, it seems like you're already contributing...

both financially and with regard to how much time you...

TimeandEntropy and in fact want to start doi: NTA -...

Maybe suggest the kids rotate the grandkids for the weekends...

do your children not like their own kids or something?...

Thranduilien NTA You are a grandparent, you have no weight...

You already seem to do A LOT for your family....

Cut them off for awhile, give yourself a break. Maybe...

Wolfenbro NTA Holy c**p! You're already doing so much above...

Paying for 2 after school activities for each kid? Watching...

Take the time off, they wanted the kids, they need...

ta*siegirl94 The grandkids are not your responsibility to parent, and...

Today my 3 children came over together and told me...

grandchildren. First off I can't believe they said that to...

tmss16 they are the ones that decided in the first...

Your job as a grandma is to be able to...

You are *not* built in childcare. 7 children at one...

told me they'd been talking and they felt I'm not...

Nathan_77 NTA and no offense but it looks like you...

eyespy_01 NTA they are lucky you take them at all....

You raised your kids, now it's their turn. 7 kids...

famousanonamos Lmao ya no: NTA. Not pulling your weight?

You already raised your kids, you don't have to raise...

My parents never see my daughter. I used to set...

but they've never taken an active interest in my life,

let alone hers (even though she was the first grandkid)...

After reading through the Reddit comments, it’s clear that many people empathize with the original poster’s situation. Raising children is a lifelong commitment, and stepping into a grandparent role, especially with seven grandchildren, is an enormous responsibility. Commenters seem to agree that setting boundaries while still offering help occasionally is a reasonable and healthy approach. It’s important for grandparents to have their own lives and goals, especially after years of hard work and sacrifice.

In my opinion, the original poster is doing what’s best for herself and her family by communicating openly and finding a balance. Offering to watch the grandchildren in smaller groups rather than all at once shows her willingness to help without overwhelming herself. Traveling and focusing on a career are valid aspirations that shouldn’t be sidelined. Ultimately, maintaining honest dialogue with her children ensures that everyone’s needs are respected and that the family can support each other sustainably.

Ankit

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