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AITA for adopting a kid my friend’s sister had planned to adopt?

by Ankit
September 18, 2025
in Aita
Reading Time: 6 mins read
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In the quiet moments of a park visit, two families intertwined by hope and love found a spark of connection that would challenge their bonds and beliefs. The innocence of children meeting for the first time masked the complexities of adoption, trust, and the fierce protectiveness that comes with choosing family against all odds.

What began as a simple act of kindness and shared joy soon spiraled into a profound test of loyalty and conviction. Despite losing friends and facing judgment, this story is a testament to the unyielding strength of doing what feels right in the heart, even when the world questions it.

AITA for adopting a kid my friend’s sister had planned to adopt?

It's been a couple years but a post on here...

My wife and I had adopted my niece Katie when...

My wife's friend introduced us to her sister, Jill, who...

Henry, who was 7 at the time. Jill took Henry...

Henry was a great kid but very hyper, presumably because...

and asked if we could watch him for a second...

Eventually it was time for us all to leave, so...

Apparently Henry himself had refused it, so the agency had...

while we were invited to an open day at a...

We were using the same agency as Jill and it...

From what Henry has said, he rejected Jill as she...

We didn't tell Jill because at this stage we'd only...

and then the park) and while we'd had some contact...

We also didn't tell our friend, but after adopting Henry...

She told Jill that we'd adopted him, and Jill replied...

We clarified the timeline immediately but our friends were shocked...

seen as off limits to us because he'd rejected Jill,...

We felt that was absurd and ended up blocking most...

about about us stealing other people's kids. Are we TA?

What do you think of this story?





THIS STORY SHOOK THE INTERNET – AND REDDITORS DIDN’T HOLD BACK.

sdgeee NTA. The child did not want to live with...

You had no intentions of adopting him, when that was...

But how incredibly selfish of all the friends AND Jill...

They are literally saying that you should have left him...

merigoround1996 NTA. At all. He wasn't 'hers' to adopt, children...

If you lost friends over this, they weren't worth keeping....

Kerostasis NTA, that's ridiculous.

If you had swooped in to take the kid before...

I might view it differently- but Jill doesn't get to...

ayalseinaj That sounds more like spite / sour gr**es than...

So, what, this kid shouldn't get adopted at all because...

FireWaterGold Those people suck: NTA. I can see how Jill...

Sounds like there was a lot of time in between...

That, coupled with the fact that the kid basically chose...

But if y'all HADN'T adopted him, he would, presumably, still...

NomNomRabies NTA What were you supposed to do,

leave Henry in the foster system because Jill didn't get...

ThunderMountain Also, you hardly knew this Jill person so you...

aznbabeeo Henry had valid concerns. I don't think dibs applies...

I'm baffled by your "friends" saying a kid was off...

After you explain the situation to your "friends", if they...

then you should just come back with "no child is...

marla-M NTA. Wow, it's not like at ex-boyfriend.

They expected you to leave the child without parents to...

If she had been in the process of adopting and...

that would have been questionable but with this timeline you...

cla*s="comment_author">Jumatsuga: NTA, he is a child, not a pet. Jill...

as her adoption request was rejected by Henry himself,

and treating him as some sort of object that can...

The story highlights the complexities and emotional challenges of blending families, especially when adoption is involved. The original poster and their wife clearly had good intentions, striving to create a loving environment for both Katie and Henry. The fact that they lost friends over their decisions underscores how personal and sometimes controversial such family dynamics can be, especially when different perspectives on parenting and adoption come into play.

Reading through the Reddit comments, it’s apparent that many people empathize with the OP’s situation, recognizing that doing what’s best for the children sometimes means making difficult choices that not everyone will understand. In the end, what matters most is the well-being and happiness of the kids, and it seems that the OP and their wife were committed to providing just that. This story serves as a reminder that family is defined not just by biology but by love and commitment.

Ankit

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