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AITA for giving my daughter an allowance?

by Ankit
September 22, 2025
in Aita
Reading Time: 6 mins read
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In the quiet rhythm of everyday life, a mother watches her daughter Rose learn the value of hard work and saving, one chore and one dollar at a time. With a simple jar of coins and a dream of a new game, Rose’s small victories ripple into lessons of responsibility and patience, blossoming like the Valentine’s Day flowers that share her name.

But beneath this tender routine, a storm brews—family expectations collide and unspoken pressures rise, threatening to unravel the delicate balance of teaching and autonomy. What began as a personal journey of growth now faces the weight of others’ demands, challenging the mother’s resolve to nurture her daughter’s independence on her own terms.

AITA for giving my daughter an allowance?

My daughter is 8. Let's call her Rose because I'm...

Basic things I think she can do. I give her...

Right now she has it in a jar and says...

She'll even do something extra like help me with dishes...

I watched him while he and his wife did their...

Long story short, he saw the jar in her room...

Then I hear about it. My nephew wants an allowance...

' his son is pretty much expected to do the...

Anyway, my brother is insisting I stop paying my daughter...

SIL is upset with me for making them look like...

His reasoning is my nephew should be doing ch**es anyway...

Plus, he isn't responsible with birthday money (I think that's...

The only reason they know now is because I've only...

She's proven responsible enough to be in charge of her...

brother is p**sed and won't 'give in to his tantrum',...

My mom has contacted me to say I'm setting a...

Husband backs me but suggest $5 a week maybe is...

Here I am caught in the middle thinking I'm doing...

(Husband originally agreed to the allowance when he was the...

Is $5 too much for an 8 year old? Do...

I seriously started to have doubts when even my husband...

What do you think of this story?





THE COMMENTS SECTION WENT WILD – REDDIT HAD *A LOT* TO SAY ABOUT THIS ONE.

wildferalfun NTA. I hope you just start laughing uproariously any...

Don't engage, don't defend your decision, just laugh and laugh...

Come the f**k on. I died. Who even thinks like...

casualcaviar NTA. you can parent your kid however you want.

giving her an allowance for ch**es isn't wrong, and neither...

yeah, kids should do ch**es. it's not bad parenting to...

and it's not bad parenting to give your kid an...

pawgma NTA Your brother refuses to give into his son's...

cla*s="comment_author">omgwtflols: NTA Getting paid an allowance for doing ch**es is...

and the fact your daughter is saving it up for...

What a great parenting style!

Your brother belongs over in r/ent*tledparets and is being a...

cla*s="comment_author">Willingplane: NTA. What you give your daughter is none of...

melanantic I think the consensus is in really,

RotisserieChicken007 I just want to say that your brother seems...

CoconutxKitten Your child's, your business. Your brother is TA for...

Especially since it's teaching your daughter money management and saving...

twarmu He needs to b**t out: NTA You have every...

Just as your brother does. I think all kids should...

They should pick up after themselves and keep their room...

But an allowance is a good thing for the reasons...

aPenguinGirl NTA!!!! Families raise their kids differently and have different...

It's as simple as that. It would be super unfair...

It's not her fault your brother has a different set...

Tell your nephew life isn't fair and he'll get paid...

Reading through the Reddit comments, it’s clear many parents admire the original poster’s approach to teaching Rose about money and responsibility through chores and saving. Commenters often praised the balance of giving an allowance while also encouraging extra work for additional earnings. The refusal to buy candy and the focus on saving for something meaningful like a Switch game was seen as a smart way to instill good financial habits early on. However, some also sympathized with the tension caused by the nephew wanting an allowance, acknowledging how sibling dynamics can complicate parenting styles.

In my opinion, the situation highlights how parenting decisions, especially about money, can ripple through family members in unexpected ways. It’s important to set boundaries and communicate clearly with relatives to avoid misunderstandings or resentment. While it’s natural for children to compare, each family’s approach should reflect their values and circumstances. The original poster’s method seems thoughtful and effective in teaching Rose valuable lessons, and it’s okay if their brother chooses a different path for his son. Ultimately, consistency and clear communication are key to navigating these tricky family dynamics.

Ankit

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