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AITA for putting my son’s money in a bank account for him pa*sive aggressively?

by John Doe
October 16, 2025
in Aita
Reading Time: 8 mins read
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Ben’s tenth birthday was meant to be a joyous milestone, a celebration of growth and achievement as he graduated from elementary school. But beneath the laughter and gifts lay a subtle storm; a clash of values between generations that threatened to overshadow the innocent excitement of a child’s special day.

In the quiet moments after the party, the tension became clear—Ben’s well-meaning grandparents saw his carefully saved money as a betrayal, while his parents sought to teach him responsibility and trust. Caught in the middle, Ben’s innocence was tested by secrets and divided loyalties, revealing how even love can be complicated by pride and misunderstanding.

AITA for putting my son’s money in a bank account for him passive aggressively?

I have a ten year old son, Ben. Ben just...

Ben is one of those lucky kids who has money...

Ben is aware of his account and has access to...

​ My MIL found out about the bank account and...

Apparently by taking the money she (or anyone) gives Ben...

Basically it's like we're spitting in the giver's face.

Recently my MIL had my son for the afternoon and...

to keep it somewhere and use it. My son was...

Apparently he felt guilty and he didn't feel like he...

​ I called my MIL and requested that she not...

My MIL started some drama, called me some names, and...

not put it in the bank, or we'd have some...

So now we just tolerate each other (badly). ​ Everyone...

My MIL gave me an envelope and told me it...

"I swear to God I'll call the cops on your...

My husband was furious at her but thinks cutting her...

​ Here's the AITA part: I put the check in...

Since it was a check she was obviously notified of...

​ AITA for this or am I justified? (I'm also...

) ​ ETA: Ben woke up about an hour ago...

over it at the party and mommy did something wrong...

I explained to him that sometimes when people fight their...

I explained to him that mommy acted on pride and...

I told him that they money was right there in...

allow that as part of my apology for keeping it...

I told him that he was a good kid for...

Ben was very understanding and forgiving and has made the...

But he said he wants to take out some money...

What do you think of this story?





HERE’S HOW REDDIT BLEW UP AFTER HEARING THIS – PEOPLE COULDN’T BELIEVE IT.

RandyBandlyleg NTA. Keep your kid away from that corrosive old...

who is trying to use gifts for children as weapons...

Don't know why you didn't tell your kid about the...

Don't let your emotions about your MIL cloud your judgement...

cynical-mage NTA,

but r/justnomil will be a good place for support and...

save for what he wants, what is wrong with your...

queenofthera ESH (but I can't tell you how much more...

You're a dainty, clean miniscule mouse a**s, she is a...

Everything she's done in here is absolutely insane and I...

Spike-Tail-Turtle Literally the only reason I'm saying ESH is because...

He's 10 and your letting him spend it as he...

Trania86 ESH. It would have been NTA if you told...

You don't want him to lie to you, but you're...

you could have easily told him that he received a...

AlphaMoose67 You could also have talk to him about perhaps...

My wife's grandma, daughters great grandma, also give us way...

like so much it's hard to find shit to spend...

Grandma gets p**sed but o well. She'd rather us blow...

party_platter INFO- do you and your husband ever deny your...

If so, how often? For what? Might your MIL know...

teambeebees NTA you're teaching Ben good life sk**ls by him...

it. I don't understand the MIL's issue, if she wants...

As far as not telling Ben about the check, I...

Maybe the MIL will bring it up next time she...

hollymayewho but that would be a weird thing for: Nta...

You mentioned telling him that this one instance he could...

said he was allowed to buy whatever he wanted if...

Alikaoz I had the sane thing happen to me as...

It's all good until your parents don't agree with what...

The MIL is clearly an a*shole, and you don't seem...

But after hiding the check from him, even if you...

After reading through the Reddit comments, it’s clear that many people sympathize with the parents’ approach to teaching financial responsibility to their son. They appreciate that Ben is learning to manage money wisely rather than spending it impulsively. The majority agree that the MIL’s request for secrecy and insistence on keeping the money out of the bank seems inappropriate and undermines the parents’ efforts to guide their child in making smart financial decisions.

In my opinion, the parents are right to prioritize transparency and financial education for their son. It’s important for children to understand the value of money and saving, especially when they receive gifts. While the MIL’s intentions might come from a place of wanting Ben to enjoy his gifts, keeping money hidden and secret from his parents is not a healthy lesson. Encouraging open communication and responsible money management will serve Ben far better in the long run.

John Doe

John is a seasoned writer with a passion for storytelling and technology.

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