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AITA for refusing to drive my girlfriend anywhere, forcing her to stop her hobby?

by John Doe
October 16, 2025
in Relationships
Reading Time: 6 mins read
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In a world where independence often hinges on the simple act of driving, a young woman’s fear and refusal to face the road become a silent barrier in her relationship. Despite encouragement and support, her anxiety grips her so tightly that every attempt to learn is met with panic and frustration, creating a chasm of unspoken tension between her and her partner.

As life presses on and responsibilities mount, the unresolved fear of driving morphs into a deeper struggle—a test of patience, understanding, and the fragile balance of love. What begins as a practical challenge slowly reveals the emotional weight carried by both, highlighting the quiet battles fought behind closed doors.

AITA for refusing to drive my girlfriend anywhere, forcing her to stop her hobby?

My (30M) girlfriend (30F) cannot drive. She did lessons over...

During covid she decided to stop working and I mentioned...

public transport, and asked her to let me know when...

After 6 months where she never asked me to practice...

She would have a panic attack every time a car...

brake she'd get angry) so I told her it'd be...

She never did and asking her about it would cause...

After getting the job she told me she'd never drive...

She now registered for dance cla*ses, which have been her...

I asked her how she was going to get there...

It screws up my evening and I did it pre...

When I told her this she said she didn't think...

and that it was even worse to force her to...

I can understand anxiousness but I've been driving her back...

So, AITA?

What do you think of this story?





REDDIT USERS WERE STUNNED – YOU WON’T BELIEVE SOME OF THESE REACTIONS.

frubi86 NTA If she decides not to drive she must...

It's not your responsibility to get her everywhere she wants....

If she doesn't want to she won't be able to...

olneyvideo NTA - y'all got UBER where you live? She...

Leave her alone about it. You can drive when you...

dyinginsect Maybe commit to taking her one day a week...

I don't drive, I don't want to drive, I have...

I walk, get buses, use trains and trams, sometimes use...

If she suggested the two of you relocate to somewhere...

cla*s="comment_author">JEFFinSoCal: >

and that it was controlling to force her to drive...

want to? NTA. She doesn't want a partner, she wants...

redflamearrow Some people have such bad anxiety concerning driving that...

This is not something you can just tell her to...

Kris82868 Additionally, they are a real danger to themselves and...

Controlling her? Not doing for someone isn't controlling them.

She'd be controlling you if anything trying to guilt you...

No-Policy-4095 NTA - This isn't being controlling, this is being...

She needs to find alternative ways to manage her anxiety...

and fancy. If she's going to manage her anxiety by...

GoldenFrog14 INFO: Is there some type of traumatic event in...

Or just the act of driving itself? Edit: Just to...

mistake_sendhelp That's the sacrifice she made when she decided not...

you may feel bad, but she cannot expect everyone else...

She's an adult, she needs to learn how to do...

Connie_Damico or arranging with those who are willing and available...

I don't drive due to anxiety. I'm not ent*tled to...

Many Reddit commenters sympathized with the OP’s frustration but also highlighted the girlfriend’s deeper anxiety and resistance toward driving. Some suggested that forcing the issue could strain their relationship further, while others recommended gentle support and possibly professional therapy to address her panic attacks. It seemed clear that the girlfriend’s avoidance was less about laziness and more about fear, which complicated the situation beyond just learning to drive.

In the end, it appears the couple faced a significant communication and expectation gap. The OP’s offer to help was generous, yet the girlfriend’s refusal to engage meant progress was unlikely without her willingness. This story serves as a reminder that practical challenges like learning to drive can intersect with emotional hurdles, and patience coupled with empathy often makes a difference in overcoming such obstacles.

John Doe

John is a seasoned writer with a passion for storytelling and technology.

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