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AITA for refusing to do house ch**es after my mom said only girls should do them?

by Charlie Brown
October 16, 2025
in Aita
Reading Time: 10 mins read
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In a house brimming with siblings, a young woman’s simple plea for fairness ignites a quiet storm. She envisions a shared effort, where everyone—brothers and sisters alike—contributes to the heavy task of cleaning their home. But her hopes are swiftly dashed by the silent acquiescence of her brothers and the unexpected resistance of her mother.

What began as a moment of unity fractures under the weight of unspoken expectations and unequal burdens. As the young woman scrubs and sweeps, the brothers remain untouched by responsibility, their laughter echoing from the other room, leaving her to wrestle not just with dirt, but with the raw sting of injustice and unheard frustration.

AITA for refusing to do house chores after my mom said only girls should do them?

I tried to post this in the sub, but it...

So I (22F) live at home with my parents and...

The house needed a deep clean, and I suggested that...

My mom actually agreed at first and said, "That sounds...

But then she told me to start by vacuuming all...

We got to work, but I started wondering when my...

I asked her about it, and she basically told me...

she got mad and said something like, "Never in my...

" I reminded her that she agreed the boys should...

" To give some context, my family believes that men...

My brothers are adults now, but they don't have jobs...

" They're free to sit around and play video games...

I even tried to ask my dad to step in,...

My mom is now really angry at me and thinks...

but part of me wonders if I'm being a jerk...

After I made that original post, I didn't tell my...

But it's gotten to the point where I'm genuinely cleaning...

They're all from my brothers, who don't wash their own...

" but she just ignores me. Just today, she told...

I finally showed her the Reddit post and all the...

Instead of actually listening, she got furious that I even...

She was angry that I put them on blast and...

"Did you mention how your mom stands all day doing...

You're only complaining because you want two out of the...

" She didn't like that one bit. She ignored what...

Here's the part that has always really adds to my...

But my adult brothers don't have jobs either, and they're...

Get a job and keep doing housework like it's my...

" I'm tired of the double standard, I genuinely don't...

If anyone else is in a situation like this, stuck...

It's SO exhausting, I guess I have to accept that...

What do you think of this story?





THE COMMENTS SECTION WENT WILD – REDDIT HAD *A LOT* TO SAY ABOUT THIS ONE.

Extra-Chocolate-1819 NTA. It's just blatant s*xism,

but I'm curious if this is just becoming an issue...

Jocelyn-1973 INFO: In what country do you live? Remember this...

curiouslycaty This has to stop somewhere.: As someone who grew...

I'm sorry you're also dealing with that. As a teenager...

I was told that they cared for the yard (i.

e mowing the lawn once a week in the summer)...

laundry several times a week as well as mopping etc....

and I think she still resents me for that 30...

despite her having seen that we live in a relatively...

The best thing I can say is to get out...

Because you will be expected to clean for your brothers...

Although I doubt it, my brother is in his 40s...

He brought his laundry home once a week for my...

Miss_Melody_Pond and he is finding it very confusing to figure...

I'd be ashamed to raise boys to believe they could...

Your parents are setting them up to completely fail in...

NickName2506 NTA, this is s***st behavior.

You're an adult, so I'd recommend you start to prepare...

Affectionate_Door607 NTA - just tell your mom, I have changed...

This is the responsibility of a wife and mother. As...

Mom this is a dirty house, you should do a...

dogtriestocatchfly NTA I have some friends that grew up in...

Blatant favoritism towards the sons, ridiculous double standards towards the...

In no way has it helped in their development, rather...

Do not go along with what your mom says and...

Tell mom you're only going to do as much as...

Just know where you stand and don't feel pressure to...

Your sister needs a good role model and the rest...

because they need to learn that this is not okay....

Mom needs to change if she wants any relationship with...

Redditnewbie2022 Okay, so why aren't they changing the oil in...

picking up sticks and leaves in the yard, and fixing...

If your parents want to split things into stereotypical male...

I'm sorry (but not really sorry), but your mom and...

It'd be one thing if they were out all day...

they are just lazy and will forever be inept at...

you and your sister will succeed in life, and you'll...

They have absolutely NO life sk**ls.

magog12 NTA Sadly it will likely take more than conversations...

Your mom is at least partially ruling through guilt. You...

Keep refusing to work and do not back down, do...

If she asks you if you are embarra*sed, ask her...

Your parents are bad parents, I'm sorry to be so...

that's clear, but they are also acting terribly towards your...

Would you be attracted to a man who is a...

Would you be interested in dating a man who expects...

It is hard to say for sure, they might find...

but on the balance of probabilities your parents are not...

Best thing for you is to move out and offer...

I'm sure it's not easy, but still might be easy...

You need to break from their control, and from there...

Hard to say for sure, but you will be in...

LowFlower6956 GL: NTA and girl move out

After reading through the Reddit comments on this post, it’s clear that many people empathize with the frustration of unequal chore distribution, especially when traditional gender roles come into play. Commenters largely agreed that expecting only the girls to handle housework while the brothers relax is unfair, and they applauded the original poster for trying to promote fairness and shared responsibility. Some suggested having a family meeting to set clear expectations and encourage everyone to contribute equally.

In my opinion, this story highlights a common but important issue in many households: the need for open communication and equitable division of labor. It’s not just about chores, but about respect and teamwork within the family. While the mother’s initial agreement was promising, her subsequent actions undermined the effort for fairness. Hopefully, by continuing to speak up, the original poster can help shift the family dynamic toward greater balance and shared effort.

Charlie Brown

Charlie is a creative mind who enjoys writing about art, music, and culture.

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