A while ago, something happened that still gets brought up between my wife and me from time to time. She’s been on my side from the start, as have most of our friends and family. But when this all went down, it felt like a full-on war erupted between us and her coworkers.
I’ve been playing guitar for over two decades—22 years, to be exact. I know the market inside and out. Guitar values, model rarity, condition—it’s all second nature to me.
One evening, my wife was hanging out with colleagues after work at her old job and casually mentioned that I’m a guitarist. One of her coworkers, who was pretty well-liked at the office, told her that his father had recently passed away and he was now sorting through his dad’s belongings. Among those things was a guitar, and he asked if I might be interested.
My wife texted me about it, and I asked him to send over photos and the asking price. The next day, he did. The guitar in question? A mint-condition 1952 Fender Telecaster—complete with original receipts. My jaw dropped. That’s how I knew the exact date. This thing was a collector’s dream.
When I asked what he wanted for it, he said he’d done some online research and felt $4,000 was a fair price. Without hesitation, I told him I’d take it. I drove over, handed him the money, and took it home. He had no emotional attachment to it—none at all.
Now here’s the twist: that guitar is worth around $50,000 depending on the buyer—and I knew it. When I got home, I told my wife what it really was and what it could be worth. She was shocked.
Two weeks later, her coworker apparently discovered the guitar’s real value from a family friend. Suddenly, he wanted it back.
He confronted my wife, and she told him—perhaps a little too bluntly—that I already knew its value, and that’s why I was so surprised he offered it for $4,000. She also told him I really loved it and probably wouldn’t sell it back, but he was welcome to ask.
He did ask, and I politely told him it wasn’t for sale. That’s when everything exploded. He accused me of scamming him and even threatened to sue and report my wife to HR for being part of the “scam.”
He actually went through with it and contacted HR. Fortunately, they saw it for what it was: a private transaction with nothing to do with the company. They told him it was between us and not their problem.
Over the next several months, he made things extremely difficult for my wife at work. Constantly bothering her, making remarks—it was relentless. She reported him to HR for harassment, and after ignoring multiple warnings, he was eventually fired.
He didn’t stop there. He kept trying to contact me, which led me to get a restraining order. I blocked him after that, and thankfully, we haven’t heard from him in about a year.
Was I the jerk for not telling him what the guitar was worth and refusing to return it? That was the question I asked online.
This post blew up way more than I expected. The consensus seems clear: I’m not the asshole. I couldn’t read all 5000+ comments, but I got through a lot.
Let me clarify a few things I left out earlier to avoid influencing people’s opinions. First, he and his father weren’t close at all. He even admitted to me that they hadn’t spoken in six years and that the funeral was more of a burden than anything. So no—this wasn’t a grief-stricken son being taken advantage of.
The guitar had been purchased brand new by his dad but was never played. Thankfully, it had been stored safely, not in a damp basement or hot attic. The wood and electronics are pristine. It sounds incredible and plays beautifully. I’m not planning to sell it—ever. Maybe 30 years from now it’ll change hands again, but not any time soon.
I might’ve considered giving him extra cash or a guitar from my own collection—if he hadn’t reacted the way he did. But the day he found out its true value, he left a nasty voicemail calling both me and my wife names, cursing at us, and even threatening to “do bad things” if I didn’t give the guitar back. That ended any goodwill I had left.
So, while some people think I should’ve disclosed the guitar’s value before buying it, I simply paid the price he asked—no tricks, no pressure. He made the offer. I just happened to know what I was looking at.
Take a look at the comments from fellow users:
NTA. When you sell something it is your responsibility to know or determine what it’s worth, not the person you are selling to.
Edit – to your edit I absolutely agree.
ESH. You blatantly took advantage of him and his ignorance. He sucks because he didn’t research it enough, and then harassed you and your wife to the point it got him fired. Just a whole messy situation. I don’t think you should sell it back to him. You paid a price he gave you (bad on him). You just seriously took advantage of him (bad on you).
ESH. Harassing you and your wife is not okay whatsoever regardless of circumstance. But let’s be real, you did prey on his ignorance and took advantage of it, which makes you suck, too.
Harsh lesson for the guy (double whammy in losing something of value AND going crazy and being fired in the process). He’s an idiot because he should have done his research. You on the other hand, will justify in your head why you think you’re in the right and won’t lose any sleep over it.
But consider this: insider trading is wrong because of information asymmetry – someone profits because of others’ ignorance. You profited from this asymmetry. Granted, not illegal, but if it were me, I would feel guilty taking that kind of advantage. This is $46K we’re talking about.
I’m a bit conflicted because it seems there may be more to the story but I’m gonna say YTA. You knew what it was worth and blatantly ripped the guy off.
He just lost his dad and was probably having a hard time and just wanting to unload stuff. You could have leveled with the guy and told him the truth.
YTA. I can’t believe how many votes on here for the opposite! This guy sold his late dad’s possession in good faith and you took advantage. What a shitty thing to do, you should have told him what it was worth.
YTA. 100{39ca6eb452c0ce4419cd73a8f3bd18a23fe95ab4febb092bc2ab1b542eeea82f} without question that was an asshole move, doesn’t mean you have to give it back. The non-asshole move would be to tell him its value before purchasing.
I feel like this thread highlights the dissonance between reality and Reddit extremely well. How can someone possibly think this is the morally right thing to do? YTA, that was really low.
YTA. There’s a legal aspect and a moral aspect to this. From a moral standpoint, yeah, they should have done better research. But you knowingly took advantage of a grieving co-worker, to the tune of tens of thousands of dollars of their inheritance. That’s just an asshole thing to do.
I vote NTA. Yeah, it really sucks for them, but they should have done a better job researching the value.
This could fuel an ethics class discussion. What you did was opportunistic. Some people value that, others see it as taking advantage. It depends on your ethics. But ultimately, you benefited from someone else’s ignorance. For that, YTA.
