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AITA for refusing to lend my brother 10k after he spent all his savings on a luxury car and now wants me to bail him out?

by Ankit
July 24, 2025
in Aita
Reading Time: 4 mins read
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A 28-year-old woman finds herself at a painful crossroads with her older brother, who has always struggled to manage money despite earning a decent salary. His reckless decision to buy a luxury car has left him drowning in debt, and now he’s begging her for $10,000 to save the vehicle from repossession. She stands firm, unwilling to bail him out after watching him squander his finances time and time again.

The brother’s desperate plea turns into anger, accusing her of selfishness and demanding loyalty simply because they’re family. Yet she knows that love doesn’t mean enabling poor choices, and her refusal to give in sparks a raw, emotional battle between responsibility and familial expectation—forcing both siblings to confront what it truly means to support one another.

AITA for refusing to lend my brother 10k after he spent all his savings on a luxury car and now wants me to bail him out?

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So I (28) have a brother (30) who's always struggled...

A few months ago, he bought a super expensive luxury...

Now he's behind on payments and called me last week...

I've worked hard for my money, and I can't justify...

He got mad, saying I'm being selfish and that I...

I told him I don't trust him with money after...

Now he's telling our parents I'm being unreasonable, and they're...

since it was a present he got me for my...

What do you think of this story?





LET’S SEE WHAT REDDIT COMMENTS HAD TO SAY – BECAUSE THIS STORY LEFT EVERYONE STUNNED.

europanya Let your parents bail his a*s out! Siblings are...

He can't afford car = not life threatening emergency. I...

wamih If he steals your dog, file charges. I am...

kb-g NTA. He can sell the car and get something...

This could be a good lesson for him if no...

He'd never help you if you ended up in this...

If your parents feel so strongly about it they can...

Local-Local-5836 Guess he needs the bank of mom and dad...

EmmaSars NTA. He made a reckless choice and now wants...

Being family doesn't mean being a financial safety net or...

VinylHighway fake thiccncharming: Your parents are probably just trying

to keep the peace, but they're not seeing the bigger...

Explain to your parents that this isn't about if you...

raucousoftricksters To keep you in a house? Sure. Dying? Sure....

MarionberryPlus8474 No.: NTA, your brother needs to grow up, sadly...

He whines to them that you won't give him (and...

And then they pressure you? Why aren't they giving him...

mm129988 Tell him to sell the car and clear out...

Reading through the Reddit comments, it’s clear that many people empathize with the dilemma faced by the original poster. While some argue that family should always support each other in tough times, the majority seem to agree that enabling irresponsible financial behavior can do more harm than good. Many commenters suggest that setting boundaries is important, especially when the brother’s poor choices led to his current situation. Some recommend helping in non-financial ways, like offering guidance or resources to improve money management, rather than handing over large sums that might never be repaid.

In my opinion, the original poster made a tough but reasonable decision. Financial support without accountability can lead to a cycle of dependency, which benefits no one in the long run. Family bonds are important, but they shouldn’t come at the cost of one’s own financial security or principles. Encouraging responsible behavior and offering emotional support might be the best way forward, helping the brother learn from his mistakes without enabling further recklessness.

Ankit

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