Every Saturday, after grueling fourteen-hour shifts, a mother carries the weight of exhaustion but still makes a special stop to pick up food and treats for her children. Despite her efforts to bring joy and comfort to her kids through sweet snacks, there is an unspoken pain in the repetitive pattern with her eldest daughter, who insists she doesn’t want anything—only to end up hurt and tearful every single week.
The quiet sacrifice of her ten-year-old son, who gives up his own treats to comfort his sister, deepens the mother’s frustration and heartache. No matter the punishments or attempts to change the cycle, the emotional struggle remains, weaving a complex tapestry of love, misunderstanding, and unspoken needs within this family’s story.
AITA For making my daughter sit in her room while the rest of us have snacks?
I work fourteen hour days on Saturdays, so I pick up food on my way home so I dont have to cook, and so pick up snacks for the kids too. Usually sweet treats that last them all week.
Every Friday I ask what they want. My two younger kids (10M, 7F) give me their list. My daughter, however, (14), always tells me she doesnt want anything. She has all of Friday and can message me at work all of Saturday if she changes her mind.
Every week, like clockwork, she insists she doesnt want anything, multiple times, and then every week she’ll huff and start crying because she doesnt have anything. My ten year old is really sweet and will instead give her his, so he doesnt have anything for the rest of the week.
He will then end up sharing with his younger sister.
This pisses me off. No matter what I do punishment wise, she wont quit her behaviour. She will cry incessantly, and claim I’m favouring them. Both kids get really upset whenever anyone cries, so its just a cycle.
Last Saturday she started again. I’d had a particularly stressful day and said she could either shut up and put up, or take her ass to her room. She continued to whine so I marched her to her room.
She was pretty shocked, but stopped crying. My younger two and I ate our snacks. They were initially kind of upset, but after I explained a little, they were happy to eat. My wife was upset but didnt say anything.
Every night after I get in we have our sweet treat. Every night oldest starts whining and so I send her to her room.
Today my wife blew up at me over it; saying she has a right to be upset, and that I should just buy her snacks anyway rather than forcefully single her out each night. I disagree; she’s a big girl, she can ask for snacks if she wants them, not manipulate her younger brother into giving his up.
Overall its created a huge rift. I will admit her behaviour has been much, much better this week, but I’m now thinking she may just be hiding from me rather than behaving. I dont know if I went too far with it or not. So, aita?
LET’S SEE WHAT REDDIT COMMENTS HAD TO SAY – BECAUSE THIS STORY LEFT EVERYONE STUNNED.
After reading through the Reddit comments, it’s clear that many people sympathize with the parent’s frustration but also see the situation from the daughter’s perspective. Some commenters suggest that the daughter may be struggling with communication or asserting her needs, which could explain why she repeatedly says she doesn’t want anything but then ends up upset. Others point out that the younger siblings’ generosity is admirable but might inadvertently enable the pattern, where the daughter relies on handouts rather than making choices for herself. Suggestions ranged from having a direct conversation about the importance of speaking up to involving the daughter in picking her snacks to encourage responsibility.
In my opinion, the key to resolving this issue lies in understanding why the daughter consistently refuses snacks initially and then regrets it. It might be less about punishment and more about building her confidence in expressing her preferences. Encouraging open communication and perhaps setting a firm but kind routine—where she either picks her snacks or goes without—could help her learn to advocate for herself. Meanwhile, praising the older siblings for their kindness while also encouraging the daughter to be proactive might create a healthier dynamic for everyone involved.
