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AITA (are we) because we started excluding a friend’s because she is a penny picker?

by Ankit
August 19, 2025
in Aita
Reading Time: 5 mins read
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AITA (are we) because we started excluding a friend’s because she is a penny picker?

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We have a 5 (sorry I miss typed) person friend...

Usually one or two people will take care of dinner...

I cook for example a lot so I buy all...

My other friends likes to order stuff and then another...

We all do that, besides our friends "Lea". She always...

But her demeanor has just kind of icked a lot...

She payed the bill in full which we thought was...

That was also the day she told us that she...

After that night we said our goodbyes ash she was...

she started hitting us up with PayPal recuest to pay...

Because of different time zones she sent that when it...

By that time she apparently had already had like a...

We all did, even tho we were confused.... Because she...

I told her as much in a phone call and...

That incident left kind of a bad feeling.

While she was on her world tour we started meeting...

We just would not invite her to random outings like...

She got wind of that and called us a*sholes for...

So are we the a*sholes?

What do you think of this story?





LET’S SEE WHAT REDDIT COMMENTS HAD TO SAY – BECAUSE THIS STORY LEFT EVERYONE STUNNED.

DelightfulAbsurdity NTA. You know how she is.

You've merely started not inviting her to other outings bc...

She's not ent*tled to all your outings. Not putting up...

‍ ETA it doesn't seem at all like you're leaving...

Teenytinkers so much as her using her frugality as an...

ghostykuromi every time she eats at your expense.: NTA.

you cant invite someone out to dinner then pay, and...

lostalldoubt86 thats just plain rude: NTA- So, you are all...

JustASaucyLittleTart Have you considered asking her for payment in the...

It's nice of you all to still be including her...

Imreallyjustconfused NTA- She's still invited to the ongoing group activity...

preexisting things, but it sounds like when you think casual...

It's a b*mmer, but you guys are also welcome to...

leathebimbo Nta It really sounds like she's kind of being...

She'll let y'all pay for her but won't return the...

It would be one thing if she was really poor,...

BioGirl956 I would recommend inviting her but make it clear...

She invited you out and never stated that she wanted...

Then freaked out because you hadn't responded immediately to the...

Do you and the other friends ever pay each other...

Beneficial-Pizza5911 Is she the only one who insists on being...

exactly why, are you even friends with this person at...

annia929 NTA Nothing wrong with wanting everyone to pay their...

y'all buy her food if she isn't willing to return...

…a substantial trust fund. This revelation explained her insistence on immediate repayments and her reluctance to participate in the usual sharing of cooking and food expenses. Many in the group began to feel that Lea’s approach to money was transactional rather than communal, which clashed with the more relaxed, give-and-take vibe the rest of the friends enjoyed. Some Reddit commenters sympathized with Lea’s need to manage her finances carefully, especially given her inheritance, while others felt she was missing out on the spirit of friendship and generosity that defined their gatherings.

In my opinion, this situation highlights the delicate balance between financial boundaries and social harmony in friendships. While it’s understandable that Lea wants to be reimbursed promptly, a little flexibility and openness might help bridge the gap and ease tensions. Friend groups often thrive on mutual understanding and shared effort, and perhaps an honest conversation about expectations around money and contributions could restore the camaraderie they cherish. After all, friendships should be about support and enjoyment, not just precise accounting.

Ankit

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