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AITA or telling my boyfriend we cant have dogs if they aren’t raised to my standards?

by Ankit
September 11, 2025
in Aita
Reading Time: 6 mins read
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They dreamed of a future together, sharing a home filled with love and the joyful presence of dogs. But beneath their shared vision lay a silent tension—two hearts wanting the same thing yet seeing it through very different eyes. His memories of carefree, untrained dogs clashed with her vision of disciplined, healthy companions, turning what should be a simple joy into a battleground of values and expectations.

In the quiet spaces between their conversations, the true challenge emerged: finding harmony not just in their desire for dogs, but in how they honored the lives those dogs would lead. It was a struggle to blend their pasts and hopes into a shared reality, where love for the animals matched the respect for their well-being. This was more than about dogs—it was about building a life where both voices were heard and valued.

AITA or telling my boyfriend we cant have dogs if they aren’t raised to my standards?

My boyfriend and I do not live together but we...

I am on board with this but I want them...

He wants them to be like his grandparent's dogs (he...

His grandparents' dogs jump, bark all the time, Beg, are...

and they always have food in their bowl. my dogs...

it helps keep them at a healthy weight), They beg...

I also tell him our dogs will not be overweight...

He always says I'm crazy when I tell him this...

So AITA for setting these rules or am I okay?...

they had this smaller dog who had gigantic tumors all...

She would end up getting stuck on her side in...

He thinks that it's cruel to put an animal down...

He wasn't raised right and that is the reason for...

and He is starting to see why his dog's behavior...

He's a good man and the only reason he acts...

that dogs do what they want and it doesn't matter...

I was raised that all creatures are equal, to live...

What do you think of this story?





AFTER THIS STORY DROPPED, REDDIT WENT INTO MELTDOWN MODE – CHECK OUT WHAT PEOPLE SAID.

brightenyourdayup NTA,

German Shepherds and Huskies are very big and can be...

If he can't handle that kind of discipline and think...

or atleast breeds that are so high maintenance. Training and...

SavannahChelsea NTA. If you give in now, down the line...

rabidturbofox BTW those are not just your standards, but most...

This is your preview. No discipline, no structure, no effort...

but just for wanting those things, he makes you the...

Shepherds are large, high-impact dogs that can be dangerous to...

rynzcycle NTA, while maybe one or two of those are...

the vast majority are just being a responsible pet owner....

TheLavenderAuthor NTA.

Maybe loosen up on the barking thing as the type...

But otherwise, it seems like a good way to raise...

CASXM So you pretty much want to have dogs that...

that sounds like just the basics of what a good...

yougotdingoinmybaby NTA: NTA you are 100{39ca6eb452c0ce4419cd73a8f3bd18a23fe95ab4febb092bc2ab1b542eeea82f}

HopelessSemantic correct: NTA. None of the things you want are...

Letting dogs go untrained is dangerous, especially with large dogs...

Koleilei NTA - taking good care of your animals does...

and refusing to have animals if you can't live up...

Lordica NTA- your boyfriend wants to be a neglectful dog...

Intelligent dogs need to be mentally engaged and that requires...

Anyone who calls you crazy or an a*shole over something...

(FYI- this guy would be a nightmare to raise kids...

After reading through the Reddit comments, it’s clear that many users empathize with the original poster’s concerns about establishing a consistent and healthy routine for future dogs. A common theme is the importance of setting clear expectations early in a relationship, especially when it involves shared responsibilities like pet care. Commenters highlighted that while compromise is important, maintaining the well-being of the dogs should be the top priority, and that differences in upbringing can be bridged through open communication and mutual respect.

In my opinion, the key takeaway is that both partners need to align on how they want to raise their pets before moving in together. It’s encouraging that the boyfriend is open to having dogs, but it’s equally important that he understands and supports the standards that contribute to the dogs’ health and happiness. By discussing and agreeing on training, feeding, and care routines now, they can avoid conflicts later and create a loving home environment for their future dogs.

Ankit

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