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AITA for refusing to pay alimony to my cheating ex-wife

by Ankit
September 15, 2025
in Aita
Reading Time: 5 mins read
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In the quiet intersection of two very different worlds, a successful man found love with a woman whose life had been simpler, yet whose presence ignited a passion he never expected. Their union birthed a family, and for over two decades, they navigated the complexities of marriage with unspoken sacrifices—him toiling endlessly to provide, her embracing the role of a devoted stay-at-home mother.

But beneath the surface of this carefully constructed life, cracks began to form, revealing a breach of trust that shattered their shared dream. The discovery of betrayal tore through the fabric of their marriage, leaving behind the painful reality of broken vows and a fractured family, forever altering the course of their intertwined lives.

AITA for refusing to pay alimony to my cheating ex-wife

I met my wife in my early 30s. She was...

I was already well established and had made a significant...

She on the other hand had never gone to college...

We get married and move in together, and soon after...

Obviously I was jealous but I went along with it...

So she spends the next 20+ years as a stay...

I'm not demeaning stay at home moms by the way,...

A couple years ago I discovered she had been cheating...

The only major a*set we had in the US was...

but since I am a finance guy I handled all...

Now if we had just grown apart, or she said...

So in the divorce she is awarded half of our...

along with alimony for 20 years for 30{39ca6eb452c0ce4419cd73a8f3bd18a23fe95ab4febb092bc2ab1b542eeea82f} of my...

So here I am given an opportunity to get out...

So I sell our house as fast as possible, move...

Once abroad I immediately stop alimony payments. Now she has...

The reason I'm asking here is that my own children...

while my daughters are 90{39ca6eb452c0ce4419cd73a8f3bd18a23fe95ab4febb092bc2ab1b542eeea82f} on their mothers side. I...

What do you think of this story?





REDDIT USERS WERE STUNNED – YOU WON’T BELIEVE SOME OF THESE REACTIONS.

Occom9000 NTA, prenups are the real deal guys-get one. Aireona302:...

She cheated she doesnt deserve a cent from you.

If you had to pay child support I would say...

But since it's just alimony f*ck her. She went and...

DaLip88 So I definitely say you're NTA here!: NTA.

People talking about how she was a stay at home...

She wanted to be a stay at home mom. That...

The way OP talks it seems like they are pretty...

Virulencer ESH. Obviously she sucks because she is a cheater...

You suck because when you married her you agreed to...

cayenne-bee As long as you're contributing to your children's needs,...

icemanthrowaway123 NTA - f**k reddits obsession.

They tried making you a slave for twenty years to...

Enjoy the freedom.

F**k any country that makes slaves of providers (as you'd...

cla*s="comment_author">mediumsizedbootyjudy: ESH. She cheated, you literally fled the country.

AITAMod Certainly you must know y'all are both the a*sholes.:...

Sorry you can't keep your discussions to your own subs...

azrhei INFO - We only have your side and the...

direction, but could be with a more complete picture. A...

if she is worthy of compensation on the second metric...

jkriina then you would be morally wrong.: NTA, screw that...

Reading through the Reddit comments, it’s clear that many readers sympathize with the original poster’s feelings of betrayal and frustration. The dynamics of their relationship—marked by a significant age gap, financial disparity, and differing life choices—seemed to create an imbalance that ultimately contributed to the breakdown of their marriage. Many commenters pointed out that while the wife’s decision to be a stay-at-home mom was respected at first, the lack of mutual support and communication might have fostered resentment on both sides.

In reflecting on the story, it’s evident that trust and shared goals are essential in any partnership. The poster’s dedication to his career and providing for the family was significant, but perhaps the emotional and relational needs within the marriage were overlooked. This story serves as a reminder that relationships require effort beyond financial stability, and without ongoing connection and understanding, even seemingly perfect arrangements can unravel.

Ankit

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