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AITA for refusing to spend time with ex-wife and grandkids? Grandkids yes ex-wife NO

by Ankit
September 16, 2025
in Aita
Reading Time: 4 mins read
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He carries the weight of decades behind him—decades of a marriage built on lies and a love that was never really there. Surrounded by the laughter of his grandchildren, called “Grumpy” with affection, he hides the ache of betrayal that runs deeper than anyone knows. The woman who once vowed love instead chose to torment, pushing him beyond his limits, turning family gatherings into battlegrounds.

Despite the expectations from his children, who see humor in the chaos, he stands firm against the relentless strain of forced togetherness. He refuses to sacrifice his peace for the sake of appearances, knowing that true family isn’t bound by blood alone but by respect and kindness. In his quiet defiance, he teaches a powerful truth: it is okay to walk away from toxicity, even when the ties run deep.

AITA for refusing to spend time with ex-wife and grandkids? Grandkids yes ex-wife NO

Divorced my ex decades ago. Two beautiful daughters, a son...

Told me she loved me but she NEVER loved me...

Literally follows me around room to room during birthday parties,...

I'm tired of it. I'm not married to her anymore....

tries to make life hard, lied to me about loving...

It creates unfair tension for them and me. I think...

What do you think of this story?





THIS STORY SHOOK THE INTERNET – AND REDDITORS DIDN’T HOLD BACK.

reddgrrl NTA. But you're thinking about this all wrong. Your...

Figure out a way to turn her hara*sment (and that...

Or as your shadow. Embarra*s her by loudly calling attention...

sa*syandsweer789 NTA Honestly your kids are a*sholes.

Most of us with divorced parents know not to stick...

The only time I expected my parents to all be...

I always respected the fact my dad can't stand my...

cla*s="comment_author">LadyReika: Yeah, you don't need to socialize with your ex...

delilah250 Info: do your kids make time for you to...

or are all interactions with everyone? NTA for not wanting...

and your kids should respect that and set up/allow for...

Bambie-Rizzo NTA. There are times where it should be everyone...

But other than that, you shouldn't have to spend time...

immadriftersbody Maybe then she'll leave you alone. Doesn't have to...

and I love that last line and think LOTS more...

ProfGoodwitch wrong thread sorry. rahr124: NTA.

They will have to make time for you separately.

My parents are divorced and we NEVER expect them to...

lovebeingana*shole They are never in a house or room together...

But it will take your children a while to see...

Dinner with the babies is awesome.

Also to be fair you and your wife normalized wife's...

Ok_Size_8987 anything other than normal for them. Definitely therapy.: NTA.

Hope you updated your will that she doesn't get a...

After reading through the Reddit comments, it’s clear that many sympathize with the original poster’s frustration and exhaustion. Numerous users agree that no one should be forced to maintain a relationship with someone who intentionally causes pain, especially after deceit and emotional harm. The consensus appears to lean towards valuing mental health and setting boundaries, even if it means stepping back from family gatherings.

In my opinion, while family ties can be important, they should never come at the cost of one’s well-being. The grandkids and children might benefit from understanding that it’s okay to distance oneself from toxicity, and that demonstrating healthy boundaries can be a powerful lesson. Ultimately, choosing peace and respect over forced interactions is a courageous and valid decision.

Ankit

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