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AITA for pushing my gf to learn basic sk**ls

by Ankit
September 20, 2025
in Aita
Reading Time: 6 mins read
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Two decades ago, a young boy witnessed his world shatter when his father abandoned his mother, leaving her to navigate an unfamiliar land without the language or skills to manage even the simplest tasks. Against all odds, his mother became an unyielding force of strength and resilience, etching in him a deep-seated conviction: any future partner must stand on their own two feet, capable and self-reliant.

Now, confronted with a girlfriend who, despite her academic achievements and stable job, leans heavily on others for the most basic responsibilities, he grapples with a stark realization. The woman he loves, who struggles to manage simple adult tasks, challenges the very foundation of his hard-earned belief in independence and self-sufficiency.

AITA for pushing my gf to learn basic skills

About 20 years ago my dad left my mum to...

She's a f**king legend, but this experience imprinted on me...

Enter my gf of 2 years - she's a uni...

As clued on as she is about her professional field...

Whenever she's asked for help with something, what she really...

A couple of examples from the last few months: (1)...

So I tried to show her some basic maintenance things...

She showed no interest, and come a couple months later...

(2) we booked a holiday for 2 weeks to tour...

At the airport she found out it was expired after...

I asked why she hadn't checked to renew it: her...

This second one is what caused her to blow up...

I returned from the holiday (she didn't answer any of...

from our city center and the terminus is at the...

I told her, sorry, but I ain't p**sing 3000 pounds...

It's really frustrating because I don't want to treat a...

What do you think of this story?





HERE’S HOW REDDIT BLEW UP AFTER HEARING THIS – PEOPLE COULDN’T BELIEVE IT.

vodka_philosophy NTA. If she is an adult then she is,...

You even asked her well in advance to make sure...

There was no reason you should have been "punished" for...

QSarICL I would sit down with her and tell her...

This isn't some kind of intrinsic personality trait that you...

Having said that, I would absolutely be a dead man...

randomfirefly Hard NTA Here in Brazil we have a world...

is a mixture of lazyness plus opportunistic plus ent*tlement plus...

which results in the people believing others should do stuff...

That person that everytime you describe one of their "episodes",

NomadofExile it's like "the freaking nerve o: NTA.

If I'm at the airport for an international trip and...

to be renewed with enough time to make the trip,...

SomeoneYouDontKnow70 NTA. I would find a new GF if I...

If you want to start and raise a family, find...

womp-womp-rats The key difference between your mum and your girlfriend...

swim and had no choice but to learn how to...

As long as your helpless girlfriend has someone (you) to...

doesn't have to take responsibility - she'll never, ever learn...

widefeetwelcome NTA. Even if her parents never taught her about...

it sounds as though she's being willfully ignorant at this...

Surely she realizes that the majority of adults are responsible...

lyraterra out how to fully take care of herself.: NTA,

but if this is such an important thing to you,...

FidgetyGidget You had to have noticed this 18 months ago.:...

It sounds like your gf grew up with parents who...

they have no idea what requirements are for seemingly basic...

MarcOfDeath let her know that it makes you feel like...

🚩🚩🚩

After reading through the Reddit comments, it’s clear that many empathize with the original poster’s feelings about wanting a self-sufficient partner, especially given the formative experience with their mother. Commenters often highlight that while independence is important, relationships also thrive on mutual support and growth. Some suggest that expecting perfect autonomy early in a relationship might be unrealistic, and that patience and communication can help partners develop those skills together.

In my opinion, the story underscores a common tension in relationships—balancing independence with interdependence. It’s understandable to want someone who can handle life’s basics, but it’s also important to recognize that everyone has different starting points. What matters most is whether both partners are willing to learn and share responsibilities moving forward. Ultimately, shared respect and effort can bridge gaps in self-sufficiency much better than rigid expectations.

Ankit

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