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AITA for telling my girls’ birth father that they don’t want to meet him?

by Ankit
September 22, 2025
in Aita
Reading Time: 6 mins read
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A man’s heart silently carried the weight of loss and love intertwined, raising his late wife’s three daughters as his own after she passed away. In the quiet strength of his devotion, he shielded his family from the shadows of their past, embodying the father they chose in him, not the one who had once fled.

Then, a message shattered their fragile peace—a man claiming to be the birth father, armed with intimate knowledge that stirred doubt and unease. Faced with the ghosts of abandonment, the daughters stood firm, their loyalty and love unwavering for the man who raised them, refusing to let the past rewrite their story.

AITA for telling my girls’ birth father that they don’t want to meet him?

I know this sounds bad but hear me out. Backstory:...

Shortly after the girls were born, he bolted, leaving her...

Sadly, my wife pa*sed away a couple years after that...

My middle (I call my daughter that's born first, my...

He knew my wife's name, where she worked at the...

I have no reason to doubt that he is my...

I asked M if she was interested in meeting him...

I asked my other two girls if they would like...

So I used M's account to message him, told him...

When I met him I asked him to stop reaching...

Apparently that made him mad and he told me that...

He then stormed off and we haven't heard from him...

but a couple of my friends told me that I...

They also said that the fact that he's reaching out...

TL;DR: my daughters' birth father wants to meet them, they...

EDIT: added/cleaned up some confusing details

What do you think of this story?





THIS STORY SHOOK THE INTERNET – AND REDDITORS DIDN’T HOLD BACK.

IkeaYayas NTA- your girls told you what was happening,

you asked all three if they wanted to meet him...

You did the right thing and the sperm donor in...

ClippityClomp Keep being a great dad!: NTA.

Like a responsible father, you sat down with your girls,...

making your decision based on what was best for them....

His biological children are telling him they want nothing to...

WailingWidow he ran out on them and then has the...

I was in a similar situation as your daughters. My...

When we got a hold of his contact info, my...

However,

the man that did raise me "encouraged" me to involve...

cla*s="comment_author">Mystic_Arts: NTA! But let's dissect this. >

Apparently that made him mad and he told me that...

If that's his right then surely the girls have rights...

>

told him that they have his contact info for when...

cla*s="comment_author">aglorifiedga*station: NTA Your daughters stated clearly what they wanted, which...

what they want in this case is what matters most,...

Virulencer you're doing great: ): NTA.

You left the decision up to the girls and they...

You even went so far as to get in touch...

mgreen1102 He may have fathered them but you are more...

You left the decision up to your daughters & all...

he has no legal rights to them as it is...

No one should make you feel bad for acting in...

Rittman925 NTA. You just pa*sed along what they said.

And he gave up any rights to them when he...

personofpaper but that still doesn't give him any rights whatsoever.:...

You asked, they answered, you listened. This is their decision...

Bio dad isn't ent*tled to just waltz back into their...

mnchemist NTA You told birth father the truth.

Your girls don't want to meet him and, as you...

You have no control over how the guy reacted.

After reading through the Reddit comments on this heartfelt story, it’s clear that many sympathize deeply with the narrator’s position. People admire his dedication to raising the girls as his own after their mother’s passing and respect the daughters’ feelings about their birth father. Most commenters agree that the bond built over years is what truly defines family, not just biology. They also suggest that while curiosity about the birth father is natural, the daughters’ comfort and emotional well-being should always come first.

In my opinion, this story highlights the complexity of family relationships and the importance of trust and love over genetics. The narrator’s protective stance and respect for his daughters’ wishes show his commitment as a parent. It’s a reminder that parental love is about presence and care, not just DNA, and that honoring the daughters’ feelings is the right path forward. Ultimately, family is chosen, and the man who raised them clearly earned that title.

Ankit

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