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AITA for not letting my bf grieve?

by Ankit
September 25, 2025
in Aita
Reading Time: 8 mins read
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In the shadow of grief and illness, a young woman finds herself caught between the fragile hope of new life and the heavy weight of loss. As her boyfriend’s family mourns a beloved grandpa, she battles the first waves of sickness, feeling isolated and vulnerable in her delicate state of pregnancy.

Her plea for comfort and care is met with distant silence, revealing the strain that sorrow can place on even the closest bonds. Alone and aching, she faces the quiet pain of being unseen, her strength tested not only by her body but by the coldness of unmet needs.

AITA for not letting my bf grieve?

Backstory: My boyfriend's grandpa pa*sed away 4 days ago. When...

Due to a sickness going around the hospital. So 2...

I told him how I felt and he basically said...

I told him I was feeling weak as well as...

I asked him if he was okay with helping me...

Basically just bring me some food to the room so...

So I told him I understand and left. When I...

I tell him how I feel more sick than when...

Around 4pm I called and asked him for help to...

No real meals and I wanted to make sure I...

He basically brushed me off saying he has no idea...

He also told me that I was being evil because...

He called me at 3am when everyone left to sleep...

But don't want to cause him more stress when he's...

Also would I be an AH for not talking to...

But at the same time I just asked for a...

Most medications you can't take during pregnancy because they have...

Update: It's been decided I am the AH here and...

I recently just paid my bills and I made groceries...

So unfortunately I cannot afford DoorDash at the moment but...

I didn't bring any food with me because all of...

Also I know he is grieving and would've never said...

Didn't even have to come inside. Also I have family...

It's really just been me and him caring for one...

Thank You for your responses Edit: I speak to my...

My friends don't live close to me to where it's...

But now that I'm an adult and since my other...

I have two siblings who aren't in their kids lives...

When I ask for help where they have to physically...

But when they ask me they feel like im just...

What do you think of this story?





AFTER THIS STORY DROPPED, REDDIT WENT INTO MELTDOWN MODE – CHECK OUT WHAT PEOPLE SAID.

SnausageFest #Sadly have to lock this one due to an...

ability to pay for a child, or really anything negative....

MiscreantMarsupial YTA. People get sick all the time.

It's a normal experience that a normal adult should be...

It's crazy to me that you feel ent*tled to catering...

Gold-Flaked-Paint and grieving a grandparent What have you done for...

I doubt the other commenters saying Y T A have...

Not having enough food to eat in that situation can...

You needed him to help care for you and he...

Management-Late Yta for so, so many reasons. You're a grown...

If you're sick you speak with your ob.

Not become a helpless baby who isolates themselves and asks...

logistics, a funeral... and you. Who took to their bed...

dragonsirens NAH. you're both coming from understandable points and this...

i would focus more on making sure the baby is...

i would also think about a*sessing your bf as a...

if you are able to step up should he be...

SleveBonzalez are the answers to those questions so: NTA He...

I caught a virus of some kind when my kids...

) I literally laid on the cement in the basement...

If you're sick enough you want help with food, he...

dr0gonsB1tch YTA. i seriously want to believe this is rage...

grief is not a simple "oh i'm sad and i...

it's like all the negative emotions balled into one with...

it's been 4 days and you're calling this man selfish...

Appropriate_Age_627 NTA grieving or not that is HIS baby. He...

His gf is sick with something she likely picked up...

Or, idk, ask one of the people who was with...

You don't just stop having responsibilities because someone died,

GlitteringGarbage579 e: NTA - you are letting him grieve but...

given you're pregnant I think it's reasonable you'd hope for...

live alone and don't have family/friends nearby) but this is...

New-Mom-Things meantime.: Unpopular opinion but you're really nta.

Pregnancy is exhausting, your immune system is shot, a sickness...

My entire pregnancy and postpartum I kept getting sick, it...

I just recently a week or so ago was sick...

After reading through the Reddit comments, it seems many people empathize with the original poster’s difficult situation. Being pregnant and feeling unwell is tough enough without feeling unsupported, especially from a partner during such a vulnerable time. Many commenters pointed out that while grief affects everyone differently, basic acts of care and communication are crucial in relationships, particularly when one person is physically unwell. There’s a general consensus that the boyfriend’s emotional state doesn’t excuse neglecting his pregnant partner’s needs, and that more empathy and teamwork are needed.

In my opinion, this story highlights the importance of compassion and mutual support in tough times. Grief can be overwhelming, but it shouldn’t overshadow the immediate needs of a loved one, especially during pregnancy. Hopefully, this couple can find a way to communicate better and support each other moving forward. It’s a reminder that small gestures of kindness and understanding can make a big difference when someone is vulnerable.

Ankit

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