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AITA for refusing to participate in a “grandma shower” at my office?

by Ankit
September 25, 2025
in Aita
Reading Time: 7 mins read
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In a vibrant workplace where celebrations are woven into the fabric of daily life, one employee’s passion for baking has become a cherished tradition, bringing joy and anticipation to every themed lunch. Her creations not only delight her colleagues but also form a unique bond, turning ordinary moments into heartfelt memories.

But joy turns to tension when a new announcement disrupts the harmony—a coworker’s pregnancy news shifts the atmosphere, and the once eagerly awaited baked goods now carry unexpected weight. What was once simple fun becomes tangled in emotions, revealing the fragile line between celebration and personal boundaries.

AITA for refusing to participate in a “grandma shower” at my office?

Hi Reddit. I admittedly have some bias when it comes...

Something about my workplace-remember the "party planning committee" in The...

The committee usually is responsible for buying everyone a cake&card...

International potluck for the Olympics, Cinco de Mayo tacos-you get...

So every time we have a themed lunch, I always...

It's gotten to the point where people are always trying...

Until now. About a week ago, my coworker announced she's...

However, since then,

the party planning committee has announced that we will be...

bring food as well as the baby registry and encouraging...

Notably-I've never met my coworker's daughter and thus seriously doubt...

I've been ignoring them all. Then, today, one of my...

I basically told her I wasn't planning on baking something...

When asked why, I just said that tbh, I don't...

My coworker made a face and said she understood but...

On the one hand, I feel like maybe I'm TA...

But on the other hand, I find it absolutely ridiculous...

I feel like I am right in standing on principle...

For context, my husband and I have been trying to...

No one at work knows, so I know they're not...

Idk, Reddit-AITA for refusing to participate or should I just...

Editing to add some additional context: As many people have...

I didn't realize how glaringly obvious that was lol! As...

Not sure if that affects anyone's opinion but I saw...

Also-mom-to-be apparently had a baby shower last weekend and another...

they're asking we buy diapers the next size up for...

& yes, we got bad news IVF-wise last week and...

What do you think of this story?





THE COMMENTS SECTION WENT WILD – REDDIT HAD *A LOT* TO SAY ABOUT THIS ONE.

WebAcceptable7932 NTA and a grandma shower is just ridiculous and...

The mother to be will get a baby shower. Throwing...

babyeventhelosers_ You're NTA for not wanting to be involved in...

who's not even having the baby themselves. If folks are...

then sure, get them some congratulatory card or trinket, but...

It's not easy to stick to your principles on something,...

Dante2377 but i: NTA. This is the "forced" dumb s**t...

StAlvis grandma shower is one of the dumber things I've...

we will be hosting a "grandma shower" This is **not**...

Timely_Egg_6827 I organised one for my office.

The granny in question organised everyone's wedding, birthday and new...

She was too old at time to get any of...

What does "granny" contribute to office because may be all...

Speckle-Fried-Pickle NTA. And good for you for NOT sharing your...

It's none of their business. The level of ridiculousness about...

This party is a "life participation trophy." And it's tacky...

Mother_Tradition_774 I think you need to ask yourself if it's...

You're NTA for not participating in this shower. However, it...

They might also choose to put in a low effort...

You may not care about any of that and if...

b**chy_badger NTA- I hate these forced office events.

Not everyone gets these life events so some people just...

If you want to great, these should be 100{39ca6eb452c0ce4419cd73a8f3bd18a23fe95ab4febb092bc2ab1b542eeea82f} optional...

Ladyughsalot1 Honestly? NAH I think you're being a little silly....

But you always do the dessert for whatever occasion right?...

They're being silly and having fun. You don't have to...

like you said,

gellybelli bake some brownies and say you can't: NTA... grandma...

to allow anyone to normalize this

After reading through the Reddit comments, it’s clear that many people empathize with the original poster’s frustration. The expectation that she should bake a special baby-themed treat for her coworker, especially when it wasn’t part of the usual routine, struck many as unfair. People appreciated her creativity and generosity in contributing baked goods for themed lunches but felt that the coworker’s demand crossed a boundary, turning a voluntary act into an obligation. Some commenters suggested standing firm on personal boundaries while others recommended open communication to clarify expectations.

In my opinion, this situation highlights the importance of setting clear limits at work, especially when personal talents like baking become part of social expectations. While it’s wonderful to share skills and contribute to a fun office atmosphere, no one should feel pressured to go beyond their comfort zone or take on extra tasks that don’t feel fair. Maintaining a balance between generosity and self-care is key, and hopefully the original poster can find a way to enjoy her baking without feeling burdened by unrealistic demands.

Ankit

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