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AITA for ‘forcing’ my son to wait to marry his then high-school girlfriend?

by Ankit
September 26, 2025
in Relationships
Reading Time: 6 mins read
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A mother watched her ambitious son, Dan, stand at a crossroads between youthful love and the promise of a brighter future. When Dan declared his desire to marry his high school sweetheart, Fran, she faced the heartache of choosing between supporting his dreams and protecting his potential. With a heavy heart, she urged him to wait, offering her support for college in hopes that time would bring clarity and growth.

Years passed, and despite the distance and challenges, Dan held onto his love for Fran, balancing the demands of college with the ties of a long-distance relationship. The mother’s quiet hope lingered—would patience and perseverance heal the uncertainties, or would the sacrifices made for a future remain overshadowed by the past?

AITA for ‘forcing’ my son to wait to marry his then high-school girlfriend?

I (f50s) have 2 sons, Dan (m22) and Sam (m27)....

At the time, Dan had multiple college options which he...

I obviously didn't support this, I wanted my son to...

I told my son that he had his whole life...

I told him that if he went to college and...

At the time I didn't know how serious their relationship...

My son happily accepted this offer and agreed with me...

and they announced their engagement a couple months ago. We...

I wasn't aware until Christmas when during dinner, Fran said...

She then said she was blessed that 'evil hadn't won'...

My son approached me later to apologise and said she...

​ **Edit** If my son had married Fran out of...

there were closer options but he liked the school he...

She wants to be a SAHM once they get married...

Fran feels awful about what she said and realised she...

This situation however has brought up other issues between the...

Fran wants them to start their life together and thinks...

Thank you for all the advice, Dan has read this...

What do you think of this story?





THE COMMENTS SECTION WENT WILD – REDDIT HAD *A LOT* TO SAY ABOUT THIS ONE.

ArwenandEowyn NTA. And your son should seriously rethink this relationship....

sour_lemons NTA, what Fran did was extremely inappropriate and a...

If I were your son, I'd be very cautious now...

We've all been there at 18 and in love and...

but statistically those relationships never work out and 18 year...

Old-Poet6587 NTA. You only wanted what was best for your...

and given how 'Fran' is acting with a few more...

I can't fault you for having reservations about him rushing...

It honestly sounds like she thrives on dramatics,

and her use of hyperbolic language suggests to me that...

cla*s="comment_author">dancing_chinese_kid: NTA >

She began saying I paid my son to not married...

She then said she was blessed that 'evil hadn't won'...

Ok-Cauliflower-1388 She said all this in front of her fiancee's...

You offered Dan a choice. Remain a dependent and what...

He's not taking accountability for his choice. Your future DIL...

If she had a grievance, she would have brought forward...

Anxiousindating She was a guest in your home and showed...

she loved and wanted the best for your son she...

scininja99 INFO: What has Fran done during this time?

Does she have a sk**l set for a career she...

Or did she just stay in the town and not...

Yellobrix NTA In the future, be prepared to wear an...

Reply as if she is expressing grat*tude for the fact...

Thamwoofgu INFO: Is Fran always stirring the pot? In other...

FamousOhioAppleHorn NTA. And this is why you shouldn't marry someone...

we got through high school together. Must be a sign...

Having read through the Reddit comments, it’s clear that many readers empathize with the mother’s initial hesitation about her son’s decision to marry so young, especially when it meant giving up college opportunities. Most commenters seem to agree that encouraging Dan to pursue his education was the right choice, as it allowed him to grow, mature, and build a stronger foundation for his future — including his relationship with Fran. There is a shared appreciation for the mother’s willingness to support her son’s dreams while gently guiding him toward a more balanced path.

In my opinion, this story highlights the importance of balancing ambition with love and timing. While rushing into marriage can sometimes lead to challenges, patience and personal growth often strengthen relationships in the long run. The mother’s thoughtful approach not only protected her son’s future but also showed trust in his ability to make the right choices when the time was right. It’s a reminder that sometimes the best support comes from offering guidance without imposing ultimatums.

Ankit

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