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AITAH for getting mad at my husband for doing exactly what I asked him to do with child’s care?

by Charlie Brown
October 16, 2025
in Relationships
Reading Time: 6 mins read
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After twenty long days of silence and sleepless nights caring for their teething baby alone, she finally saw him step through the door—unexpected and victorious with a hard-earned promotion. The surge of relief and pride filled her heart, masking the exhaustion etched deep into her weary soul.

But as the day wore on, the fragile joy crumbled. Her desperate plea for just an hour of respite was met with neglect, leaving their child in distress and her anxiety boiling over. The man she celebrated became the source of her deepest frustration, igniting a storm of harsh words and shattered trust.

AITAH for getting mad at my husband for doing exactly what I asked him to do with child’s care?

My (29F) husband (30M) has been gone for 20 days...

Unannounced he walked in the door this morning (1 week...

He also told me he received a long awaited work...

He makes excuses why he can't take the baby. Three...

I wake up & it's an hour later- the baby...

He held him while on his phone & maybe played...

Also he needs to do more, like 15{39ca6eb452c0ce4419cd73a8f3bd18a23fe95ab4febb092bc2ab1b542eeea82f} of baby...

I told him he needs to do a parenting cla*s...

I am just so tired of feeling like the only...

Argument went back & forth, things got heated & he...

AlTAH for getting mad at my husband for not doing...

Update/Edit: my husband and I had a discussion when he...

He forgave me and we are working to partner better...

And today (Father's Day) I got 3 hours to myself...

Thank you everyone for your responses, critical and supportive. I...

For those wondering about his occupation, he truly had no...

I'll definitely look out for signs of "weaponized incompetence" and...

What do you think of this story?





AFTER THIS STORY DROPPED, REDDIT WENT INTO MELTDOWN MODE – CHECK OUT WHAT PEOPLE SAID.

Pleasant-Koala147 If you think he's the cause of your anxiety...

under-supported, could you go back to your family for a...

Take some time to get some support (and sleep) and...

Anteater3100 My husband would be gone for 6 weeks at...

He'd come home, and I got an entire day to...

Did I give a d**n, also nope. I got to...

training_tortoises So glad when that stopped, and he was home...

Additional_Reserve30 sounds like he's not even doing the bare minimum...

free by choice, but I will say - I foster...

When we first moved in together, my husband immediately taught...

CJCreggsGoldfish NTAH because it sounds like weaponized incompetence - she...

she didn't say feed him if he gets hungry or...

I'm a functional adult who just got a promotion but...

LargeWiseOwl What was he doing for 20 days that put...

Last_Caterpillar8770 This is tough and I will say a major...

I will tell you that the military often has spouse...

You are both most likely overwhelmed and exhausted for different...

Foxyfumbles They know usually know who runs the support groups...

Writer_Girl04 and a loving partner would help their struggling one...

a newborn I was 13, I babysat with my brother...

change her nappy, make sure she had her nappy cream...

your grown husband can look after your kid for one...

happyasaclamtoo When men don't want to do something they will...

yourself out of sheer frustration. There needs to be a...

Men often feel that when they are home their work...

There has to be an understanding between both of you...

After reading through the Reddit comments, it’s clear that many sympathize with the wife’s frustration and exhaustion. The consensus seems to be that while the husband’s surprise return and promotion are positive, his lack of involvement and attentiveness to their child is unacceptable. Many commenters emphasize the importance of teamwork and communication, especially when caring for a young baby without nearby family support. The husband’s behavior, including ignoring the baby’s basic needs and dismissing his wife’s request for help, understandably sparked a strong emotional reaction.

In my opinion, this story highlights the challenges new parents face when the burden falls disproportionately on one partner. The husband’s surprise return, while initially joyful, quickly revealed deeper issues in their parenting dynamic. It’s crucial for both partners to actively share responsibilities and communicate openly to avoid burnout and resentment. Hopefully, this couple can use this experience as a turning point to improve their cooperation and support for each other in raising their child.

Charlie Brown

Charlie is a creative mind who enjoys writing about art, music, and culture.

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