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AITA for telling my daughter she can’t use her anxiety as an excuse for everything?

by Jane Smith
October 16, 2025
in Relationships
Reading Time: 6 mins read
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A mother watches her 16-year-old daughter struggle beneath the heavy weight of anxiety, desperately trying to be the pillar of support she needs. Though she cannot fully grasp the depths of her daughter’s pain, she has walked her own path through anxiety and offers love, hope, and guidance to help her daughter navigate the storm.

But with each passing day, the line between genuine suffering and a shield against responsibility blurs, igniting a painful tension between compassion and frustration. The mother’s heart aches as she grapples with the delicate balance of understanding her daughter’s battles while urging her to find strength beyond fear.

AITA for telling my daughter she can’t use her anxiety as an excuse for everything?

I'll open this up with a trigger warning, because I...

While I obviously cannot understand her unique experiences, I do...

I helped her set up appointments with therapists and doctors,...

However, for the past 6 months or so, she seems...

For example, I'll ask her to help me do ch**es...

I'll ask her why she did poorly on a test,...

I sympathize with her feelings, but still, in my opinion,...

The incident in question happened the other day, when my...

The three of us were going to go out for...

I knew this would hurt my sister, so I told...

but everyone has their own stuff going on and she...

Also this is after *numerous* sit-down conversations where I have...

My daughter started crying and calling me a b**ch who...

I said it's true that I may not entirely understand,...

What do you think of this story?





AFTER THIS STORY DROPPED, REDDIT WENT INTO MELTDOWN MODE – CHECK OUT WHAT PEOPLE SAID.

peanootzramano NTA. As someone who also struggles severely with anxiety,

I understand what your daughter goes through. It can be...

But having disorders like that do not immediately absolve us...

Sometimes we have to force ourselves to push through, even...

DokiDokiDarling I am commenting as a person with an anxiety...

therapy. I have advice I sincerely hope OP will see.

EVERY SINGLE EXAMPLE of her using her anxiety as an...

She should never be allowed to be 100{39ca6eb452c0ce4419cd73a8f3bd18a23fe95ab4febb092bc2ab1b542eeea82f} "off the...

mylittlepoggie INFO: have you spoken to her psychiatrist/therapist?

She's 16 so they should be keeping you informed of...

Dontbethatguyrichard saying in session.: INFO: is she in therapy? What...

CheyBridgeMan Hmmm. Besides medication or CBT,

has she learned any techniques for mitigating her anxiety such...

Are these examples you've mentioned being brought to her therapist's...

all02116 It can manifest in various ways and at different...

and can completely understand that she is feeling anxious and...

That being said,

I understand that as her mother you want to make...

LadyBat89 anxiety as an excuse to not do things.: NAH,

it does kind of sound like your kid is using...

>The incident in question happened the other day, when my...

They have a great relationship generally, and my sister loves...

Purry96 when half an hour befo: Gently, but YTA.

Anxiety can come in swells, so she will have days...

I'm sure your sister would have understood if you explained...

The_Rural_Banshee Telling her she can't use it to absolve her...

While i think she probably actually did have bad anxiety...

she is old enough now that she needs to really...

The more she avoids things because of her anxiety the...

I don't know her specific diagnosis,

roseofjuly but it's also very very possible that when she...

My daughter is 16 years old and has an anxiety...

I do understand what it is like to have anxiety...

Having an anxiety disorder is *very, very* different from simply...

It's really difficult to help people understand when they've never...

Reading through the Reddit comments, it’s clear that many people empathize deeply with both the parent and the daughter. Several commenters emphasized the importance of validating the daughter’s anxiety while also encouraging her to develop coping skills and resilience. Others pointed out that anxiety can be debilitating in ways that are invisible to outsiders, making it difficult to simply “push past” it. Many suggested that gradual exposure to responsibilities, combined with professional support, might help the daughter balance her mental health needs with everyday demands.

In my opinion, this story highlights the complex dynamic between supporting a loved one with anxiety and encouraging personal growth. It’s a delicate balance between understanding genuine struggles and fostering accountability. Patience, open communication, and professional guidance appear to be key in navigating this challenge. Ultimately, both the parent and daughter seem committed to working through this together, which offers hope for progress and healing over time.

Jane Smith

Jane loves exploring new cultures and writing about travel and lifestyle.

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