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AITA for telling my brother I won’t help him until he pays me what he owes me?

by Charlie Brown
October 16, 2025
in Aita
Reading Time: 6 mins read
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From a young age, he bore the weight of responsibility alone, tirelessly working and saving every penny with a fierce determination to secure his own future. While his family enjoyed financial comfort, he chose a path of sacrifice and self-reliance, dreaming of a college education that would be his alone.

But betrayal cut deep when the money he painstakingly earned was taken without consent, erased in the name of fairness to a brother who never shared the same struggle. The dream he built with sweat and grit was shattered, leaving scars not just on his savings, but on the fragile bonds of family he once hoped to trust.

AITA for telling my brother I won’t help him until he pays me what he owes me?

I (29M) don't have a good relationship with my parents...

Ever since I was a kid (around 9 or 10)...

offering house work on weekends or school breaks, any money...

Then when I was 14 had an actual part time...

My parents make good money but never expected them to...

Guess what my parents decided?

Since both of wanted to go to college they had...

The money I worked my a*s off to save when...

My parents f**ked up taking the money but it also...

He thought it was only fair too because he wanted...

So he was fine with taking my money and I...

That was a huge betrayal for me which is why...

He had a small business that opened right before covid...

He came to me since neither him and his wife...

It all reminded me of the grinding I had to...

So it all just reminded me the struggling was because...

We had a long argument. Bottom line he's angry/hurt that...

Guess what makes me wonder if I'm an a*s is...

What do you think of this story?





THE COMMENTS SECTION WENT WILD – REDDIT HAD *A LOT* TO SAY ABOUT THIS ONE.

looseylucy11 NTA. Tell him to ask your parents.

FancyPantsDancer NTA- he was 18 when he made the decision...

He had 11 years to try to make amends. They're...

I don't know what is meant by "afford their own...

Abject-Definition639 If it's the latter, can't they live with your...

I don't care that he was "only 18," he knew...

Avebury1 NTA but your brother and parents sure are.

Notice he only reached out to you when he needed...

Not only would I not give him a dime I...

I would tell your brother that you are not his...

means.

TheFriedBri NTA - your brother knew back then what he...

DDecimal for money again. Why can't mom and dad help...

Therapy-1 You are well within your rights to seek in...

You got the money together for your use,regardless of what...

Common_Loquat3382 NTA he's had 10 years to fix that mistake,...

Odd_Transition222 NTA. Whether he and your parents stole from you...

whether he tried to pay you back or not, whether...

You don't owe the grown-a$$ wife anything either.

Remdog58 NTA A decade later after being robbed by him...

No apology just asking to look past that? He and...

I can see your parents having most of the blame,...

Reading through the Reddit comments, many users expressed sympathy for the original poster’s situation, emphasizing how unfair it was for the parents to dip into a fund that was clearly earned through hard work and personal sacrifice. Several commenters pointed out that while parents often want to support all their children equally, it should never come at the expense of disregarding the individual efforts one child made to save and prepare for their future. There was a strong consensus that the brother’s lack of contribution and the parents’ decision to split the money equally created a deep sense of betrayal and understandably fractured family relationships.

In my opinion, this story highlights the importance of clear boundaries and communication when it comes to financial matters within families. While the desire to treat children equally is understandable, it should not override respect for personal responsibility and effort. The resulting estrangement between the poster, their twin, and their parents is a painful reminder that money can deeply affect family dynamics, especially when fairness is perceived to be compromised. Ultimately, it’s crucial for families to find ways to honor individual contributions without breeding resentment or damaging relationships.

Charlie Brown

Charlie is a creative mind who enjoys writing about art, music, and culture.

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