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AITA for asking my boyfriend’s estranged mother for help?

by John Doe
October 16, 2025
in Relationships
Reading Time: 5 mins read
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Caught in the relentless cycle of Alan’s destructive choices, she faced a heart-wrenching dilemma: sacrifice her future dreams or save the man she loved from his own mistakes. When her pleas to friends for help fell silent, she reached across a broken bridge to Alan’s estranged mother, hoping to mend more than just his immediate crisis.

But trust, once shattered, is fragile beyond repair. Alan’s furious betrayal over her secret left their lives fractured, his silence echoing in the void of their empty home. In trying to save him, she lost the man she thought she knew—and the future they might have had together.

AITA for asking my boyfriend’s estranged mother for help?

My boyfriend (Alan) blew twice the legal limit again. His...

I was worried he'll be unable to pay as he...

So as a last resort, I phoned Alan's mom and...

(Alan's been NC from his mom for 2 years after...

I didn't tell Alan where I got the money, I...

He later moved out from our apartment and has not...

Well, he broke up with me so. I messaged his...

I will be moving back in with my parents who...

Thanks again for your comments, advice, and to those who...

What do you think of this story?





THIS STORY SHOOK THE INTERNET – AND REDDITORS DIDN’T HOLD BACK.

FunkyOrangePenguin YTA to yourself.

This guy blows twice past the legal limit and asks...

evita12345 Dump him and focus on school. You're better than...

He wanted you to use your savings to bail him...

Studoku He sounds like a t**d. Good riddance: Y T...

SoupSatireSleep Nta for asking for help. But YTA if you...

SaltRevolutionary917 Good riddance.

Why would you be with a man who blows twice...

You realize how many people drunk drivers k**l, right?

Do you really want to date someone who doesn't care...

nova345 NTA but take Alan leaving on his own as...

Dodged a bullet. He was going to jeopardise your future...

If the mum showed up and caused a lot of...

this. Anyway when he comes crawling back to use you...

kitn NTA for asking his mother when you don't believe...

YTA for enabling someone to drink and drive, ***again***. He...

He could very easily have k**led people. Why are you...

ShadyVermin He's not been answering your calls? Good!

He was perfectly ok with you wasting $6,000 on his...

His mother was very kind to help out, sounds like...

NTA for being a good person and wanting to help,...

Borgteddy >My boyfriend (Alan) blew twice the legal limit again...

he doesn't earn much as a bartender Maybe he should...

>I asked our friends if they could help and no...

MyChoiceNotYours (Alan's been NC from his mom for 2 years...

YTA to yourself. He expected you to bail him out...

Leave him before he k**ls someone potentially even you.

You shouldn't have bailed him out in the first place...

After reading through the Reddit comments, it’s clear that many people sympathize with the girlfriend’s position. They acknowledge her concerns about using her savings for bail, especially since she has educational goals to consider. Many commenters also felt that reaching out to Alan’s mom, despite the strained relationship, was a practical solution to a difficult situation when no one else was willing to help. However, some criticized Alan for reacting harshly and cutting off communication when he learned the truth, suggesting that honesty and trust are crucial in a relationship, but his behavior seemed disproportionate given the circumstances.

In my opinion, the girlfriend acted responsibly and thoughtfully under pressure, trying to balance supporting her partner with protecting her own future. Alan’s decision to blow twice the legal limit again is a serious issue that likely contributed more to the breakdown of trust than her choice to seek help. Ultimately, this situation highlights the importance of accountability and open communication in relationships, especially when dealing with repeated risky behavior. It seems their relationship had deeper problems that money alone couldn’t fix.

John Doe

John is a seasoned writer with a passion for storytelling and technology.

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