The Original Poster (OP) discovered that his wife intended to send their 16-year-old son, Noah, to a conversion camp because of his sexual orientation. This disagreement over a serious decision regarding their son’s well-being escalated into a major conflict between the OP and his wife. The OP had previously shown his wife materials detailing the harm caused by such camps, but she remained firm in her belief that their son needed to be “cured.”
After consulting an attorney, the OP informed his son of the potential divorce and his commitment to protecting him, which brought the son great relief but also deep sadness. The OP then confronted his wife, who reacted with anger, using derogatory language and ultimately resorting to physical violence against both the OP and their son. Faced with this extreme behavior and physical assault, the OP is now seeking a divorce and full custody. His central dilemma is how to swiftly and securely separate his family from his wife’s harmful actions.
UPDATE: WIBTA to divorce my wife after she said she wanted to send our son to a conversion camp?
According to Dr. Sloane Price, a specialist in family crisis intervention, “When ideological differences intersect with clear threats to a minor’s physical and psychological safety, the response must prioritize immediate removal from the source of harm, regardless of marital status.”
The OP’s initial attempts at education and dialogue failed because the wife’s stance was rooted not in differing opinions but in deep-seated prejudice, which manifested as emotional abuse toward her son for months prior to the OP’s discovery. The wife’s actions—planning forced “cures,” pressuring the son, and finally resorting to physical violence when confronted—demonstrate a severe breach of parental responsibility and a clear danger to the children’s welfare. The OP correctly identified the severity of the situation when he consulted legal counsel, as actions like planning conversion therapy and subsequent physical assault justify immediate protective measures.
The OP acted appropriately by immediately siding with his son and seeking external legal advice. Given the confirmed physical violence and the children’s expressed wishes, the OP should proceed aggressively with the divorce filing, aiming for full custody based on documented evidence of abuse and endangerment. Involving CPS is highly recommended, as their intervention can provide an objective assessment and potentially mandated support or monitoring, reinforcing the legal case for full custody and ensuring a structured separation from the abusive environment.
HERE’S HOW REDDIT BLEW UP AFTER HEARING THIS – PEOPLE COULDN’T BELIEVE IT.
The OP is now facing the immediate fallout of a severe domestic incident where his wife physically assaulted him and their son following the confrontation about the conversion camp. The conflict has moved beyond ideological differences regarding acceptance of their son’s identity to encompass serious physical harm and potential criminal charges against the wife. The OP’s priority has shifted entirely to ensuring the safety and emotional recovery of his children.
The core question is how the OP should proceed legally and practically to safeguard his children from a parent who has demonstrated physical violence and extreme intolerance. Should the OP focus solely on a swift divorce and custody agreement, or is involving Child Protective Services a necessary additional step to ensure long-term protection for both children?
