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AITAH for taking away all of my daughter’s luxuries after comments that she made about me?

by Michael Lee
October 16, 2025
in Aita
Reading Time: 17 mins read
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In the quiet of a park brunch, a father and daughter faced the fragile truth between them—words said in haste, hearts bruised by misunderstanding. The daughter, caught in the whirlwind of youth and peer pressure, revealed a painful regret: the lies told to shield her pride had only deepened the distance from the one who loves her most.

Beneath the surface of teenage defiance lay a yearning for honesty and connection. She confessed to feeling weary of the façades she maintained with her friends, exposing the silent struggle of growing up and the desperate desire to be seen and accepted for who she truly is.

AITAH for taking away all of my daughter’s luxuries after comments that she made about me?

Final Update: This shall be my final update on this...

I won't go into great depth about what was said...

as I feel like enough has already been said and...

- My daughter regretted telling her friends what she did...

She was (as many Redditors rightly pointed out) trying to...

She said it on the spur of the moment and...

And when we discussed why she felt that she had...

And I can certainly understand why that would be frustrating...

and I can see why she would've reacted in a...

She's a teen girl and I can see now why...

punishment that I gave her. On reflecting back, I know...

And I should've kept the punishment respective to only confiscating...

In retrospect, that is the correct way that I should've...

and for that I apologised to her. That is a...

There are no excuses that can be made for what...

I value that time that I get to spend with...

and that does go back to the fact that I...

And we will look to seek family counselling together if...

Because whilst my best friend/my daughter's godmother helped to make...

we know that we know that seeing a counsellor to...

My daughter also wants me to seek counselling for the...

As much as I thought that I was able to...

(So a number of Redditors were right in saying that...

one person who sees me every day). I last had...

But I am open and willing to give it another...

We both can see where we made mistakes in how...

And we both hold regrets on how we've behaved towards...

because I am the adult in our house and I...

We want to move past this entire ordeal with a...

and how that neither of us are perfect and that...

We have 16 years worth of special memories together that...

And whilst unintentional hurtful words might sometimes sting,

that doesn't mean that we don't love each other as...

And once again, I want to finish this off by...

I wasn't sure what to expect when I came onto...

And the constructive criticism that many of you gave truly...

picture before going into the heart to heart conversation with...

Every day can bring about a new learning experience, especially...

And final side note. All of the text below that...

_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________ For context I am a single father (34M) to...

from Scotland. I've pretty much raised her myself ever since...

Her Mother wasn't fully committed to having a child due...

However I knew that I wanted this baby girl in...

Then the eventuality came, and her Mother left us and...

She's the only person who has factored into my life...

There has been challenges along the way, and some very...

and I believe that I've done a good job in...

She is honestly the best daughter that I could've ever...

She has always been what they would call a 'Daddy's...

buying her things whenever she has asked for them. Though...

A few weeks ago, a few of her best friends...

My daughter and her friends have known each other since...

They must've a*sumed that I was too far out of...

and how lucky she is for having a Dad who...

She started laughing, as she told her friends about how...

My daughter and her friends then all laughed together and...

Hearing these words coming from the mouth of the one...

and it feels as though she has physically ripped my...

After her friends left,

I sat down for dinner with my daughter and I...

me. In that instant I saw the look in her...

But after a few moments, the look on her face...

I don't believe that she is sorry or ashamed for...

As punishment, I have taken away the luxuries that I...

I've replaced her contract phone with a simple phone that...

and I've also cancelled bookings for upcoming father/daughter days that...

Such as food, clothing, a roof over her head, money...

My daughter feels that I am being incredibly unfair towards...

Which of course I do fear it could cause an...

However I feel as though this is a fair punishment....

Whilst also disrespecting me by laughing about how easy I...

And I promise that this isn't AI created, nor for...

Because this entire ordeal has scrambled my entire head and...

Thank you for listening to this incredibly long rant. It...

Thank you to everyone so far for your responses, I...

I feel that both are needed to try and help...

but I do appreciate everyone who has taken time out...

Just a few clarifications and minor bits of information that...

She has since backtracked on that and has apologised, saying...

She does seem to be genuinely upset and deeply regrets...

and my best friend (and my daughter's Godmother) has offered...

Because we all want to get this sorted, and I...

But I still feel that it will take a while...

thank you everyone for taking your time to respond to...

___________ Update 2: Except for a few comments about the...

I am glad that I decided to take this to...

Firstly, I didn't want a biased opinion from family or...

And Secondly, I don't wish to run the risk of...

I've been reading through the comments, getting all your opinions...

and I am going to take a while to go...

I want to go into this all with as clear...

And I 100% agree with those who have said that...

She has already lost one parent, and it is wrong...

That was incredibly wrong of me, and I do intend...

Finally, looking back on what I included in my original...

But I won't edit it out, as I feel that...

I regret saying that she is most likely only sorry...

_______ Update: Okay, I feel as though that I need...

- I haven't emotionally manipulated her into a situation where...

We have been discussing her future plans, such as university...

and there is nothing that would make me prouder than...

Her future dreams matter to me, and her accomplishments make...

She is very active in sport and has a social...

And during that time, I will spend my free time...

- I didn't really want to address my future plans...

but as some have decided to bring it up and...

I am fully aware of the fact that once she...

That is something that I want for myself in the...

Though if a partner does come along in the meantime,...

My daughter knows this, and besides from jokingly saying "eewww"...

So I hope that we can get over thinking that...

But that doesn't mean that she's being denied a life...

What do you think of this story?





AFTER THIS STORY DROPPED, REDDIT WENT INTO MELTDOWN MODE – CHECK OUT WHAT PEOPLE SAID.

Alternative_Wolf_643 I think you're too dependant on your daughter.

This is totally normal teenage behaviour and you're acting as...

I think the fact that she has been THE ONLY...

well to have a father so dependant on her. She...

deathboyuk She is a teenager, not your life partner. Give...

They say things to sound cool that aren't true. They...

Which is more likely? a) She's played you like a...

b) She said a mean lie to come off cool...

You can't let that relationship drop. You're the grownup, dust...

ToyrewaDokoDeska She's 16 brother, I think she was probably just...

ApprehensivePause115 PLEASE READ THIS ON YOUR UPDATE.

Read your update - PLEASE DON'T USE A FAMILY FRIEND...

It may seem like a good idea because it's a...

they will have their own prejudice and opinions even if...

also it's getting others involved in your personal life in...

Outsource your counsellor, do a trial session, if you both...

if one of you doesn't it's okay just try a...

help you guys work it out and then step out...

NateZ10 THIS IS VERY VERY IMPORTANT I BEG: Honestly dude...

What she said was hurtful to be fair, but she's...

I think you allowed yourself to sit too deeply into...

Impossible_Apple7822 Sounds like she was just trying to sound edgy...

beepbeepitsthejeep hope you can both sort it through: My concern...

but the way you're making it out to be that...

Your teenager is far less likely to be some master...

and is probably genuinely sobbing and begging you to believe...

THAT is going to damage your relationship. What she said...

said to impress her friends and seem edgy, but you...

As THE adult in her life? I feel like you...

because seemingly doubting she's loved you is not a healthy...

apparently, that you feel like she doesn't love you, since...

She needs to know words have consequences, but dude, make...

because the idea that she doesn't after a shitty comment...

I think counseling would be good, because holy God, would...

believing you no longer love her and that you doubt...

Prize_Maximum_8815 Especially a kid with issues with abandonment already.: Parenting...

Sometimes, there are no right answers. Looking back, I feel...

I would say you should try to treat this as...

Letting her gradually earn your trust back as you try...

Jmhotioli1234 I think you and your daughter would benefit from...

Tell her how hurt you were and that you want...

If she willing agrees to counseling, you'll know she does...

She needs to see how much pain she caused you.

Rough_Rhubarb_5733 I don't think having consequences for how she hurt...

father daughter dance seems like you are withholding love from...

Kids say and do stupid things. Don't withhold your love...

After reading through the Reddit comments, it’s clear that many users empathized with the complexities of the father-daughter relationship and the pressures teenagers face when trying to fit in with their peers. Commenters acknowledged the daughter’s struggle to balance her independence with her close relationship with her dad, and they appreciated the honesty in the father’s final update. It’s refreshing to see such open communication leading to understanding and healing, rather than resentment.

In my opinion, this story highlights an important lesson about the need for patience and empathy in family dynamics. The daughter’s regret and the father’s willingness to listen and forgive show how crucial it is to create a safe space for honest conversations. It’s a reminder that sometimes, what appears as rebellion or dishonesty is actually a sign of deeper insecurities and the universal desire to be accepted.

Michael Lee

Michael is a tech enthusiast sharing insights on software development and gadgets.

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