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AITA for telling my mom I won’t pay rent AND do ch**es to live with them?

by Jane Smith
October 20, 2025
in Aita
Reading Time: 9 mins read
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At just 24, she had woven her life around the quiet sacrifices made within the walls of her childhood home—trading rent for relentless chores and the tender care of her young cousin. Every scraped knee she mended and every meal she cooked was a silent testament to her love, a currency far richer than money, yet often overlooked. Her dreams were folded neatly alongside the bills she managed, all while she saved for a future painted with hope.

Then, like a sudden chill in a once warm room, her parents asked for rent. Not out of hardship, but a desire for contribution—a shift that unsettled her equilibrium. Though the price was still less than the world outside, the request chipped away at the unspoken pact they shared, leaving her to grapple with the cost of care and the price of belonging.

AITA for telling my mom I won’t pay rent AND do chores to live with them?

H**lo! I'm 24(f) and I live with my parents currently....

I've been basically "paying" rent by doing the ch**es, mainly...

cooking their meals and taking care of my 5(f) cousin(due...

This hasn't left me with that much free time however...

Recently however my parents have asked me to start paying...

I asked them if everything was ok and if they're...

for free after finishing college.

I'm not gonna lie I was a bit b*mped but...

A few hours ago however my mom confronted me about...

She said they tried to be understanding but this can't...

Since the deal was that me doing ch**es was going...

She got mad, called me ungrateful and spoiled.

I told her she can't expect me to pay rent...

more at this point.

She got angry once more because I'd rather "give money...

He's gonna be back in a few hours and honestly...

Apologies for any mistakes/errors. EDIT: thank you everyone for your...

This is probably the only solution regardless of the outcome...

Thank you for the advice and suggestions: ) EDIT 2:...

But first of all I'd like to clear up some...

By ch**es I don't mean just washing the dishes and...

A lot of you also a*sumed that just because I...

How y'all reached that conclusion instead of the sane one...

No, I do not expect them to clean after me...

They do not support me financially and haven't done so...

I buy my own groceries, whatever shared necessities( toilet paper,...

The reason I'm still living with them is literally the...

Yes I am aware that once I move out I'll...

I've lived with roommates before and I know I'd have...

My dad came home last night a few hours after...

I was quite anxious and could barely sleep ngl. Well...

My dad told me that he's discussed things with mom...

I asked, as some suggested in the comments, if they're...

Once again he denied that and both of them got...

They just think it's still a fair deal even with...

I told them that I get it's their house and...

They didn't quite like that either.

My mom brought up once more the fact that I'd...

contributing to the household so far. She started tearing up...

About how my cousin loves me and abandoning her would...

My father then told me he thinks I'm irrational and...

because I'll see that they're right once I've thought things...

I already started searching for a place and I think...

What do you think of this story?





REDDIT USERS WERE STUNNED – YOU WON’T BELIEVE SOME OF THESE REACTIONS.

Na**Leonie NTA. Your parents-or at least your mother- k**led the...

It's one thing to do ch**es but what you've been...

ConfusedAt63 Don't let them guilt you into staying.: Here is...

if you had your own place you would only be...

albad11 You will have more feee time on your own...

or two ideally - and move out. Your parents are...

not your problem and the slacking ch**es thing is just...

lmmontes No need to argue: just gtf out of the...

Where I live there a limits to how much people...

Based on what you are saving, consider how much work...

Rude_Vermicelli2268 NTA She doesn't get to have it both ways.

Either you pay rent and she treats you like a...

Personally i would rather pay a stranger and have my...

CuriousNebula43 NTA, but is it possible something else is going...

Maybe they don't want you to live with them anymore...

Maybe it's time for a hard talk where you fully...

Ok_Conversation9750 But also realize, it's ok for them to say...

That's like hiring a live in maid and charging them...

forgeris I recommend moving out.: It's your family and you...

but IMO you are right - you either pay your...

Would be the best if you would start charging them...

so they can see that by starting monetary relationship with...

If they would rent your room to someone unrelated they...

"owe" them they have no problem milking you. The best...

redpenracc**n NTA. They want you to pay THEM on top...

When you said ch**es I was expecting you to say...

But you're their cook, their maid, their personal shopper, their...

Your parents are guilt tripping you. You're not an a*shole;...

If I were you, I'd save up as much money...

Senior-Term-635 NTA You are their house help.

Doing their book work, grocery shopping, housework, and child care.

Asking you to pay for the privilege of doing all...

(As it very likely would not effect my overall judgement...

) Expecting a 24 year old to not make plans...

Reading through the Reddit comments, many users expressed sympathy for the original poster’s situation, acknowledging the challenging balance she maintained between working, managing household responsibilities, and caring for her young cousin. Commenters generally agreed that while it’s reasonable for parents to ask for rent eventually, the abrupt shift without prior discussion felt unfair given all the unpaid labor she’s contributed. Some suggested a more gradual approach or negotiating a reduced rent in exchange for continuing her household duties.

In my opinion, this scenario highlights the importance of clear communication and mutual respect within family living arrangements. While it’s understandable for parents to want financial contribution from their adult child, it’s equally important to recognize the value of the non-monetary support she provides. Ideally, they should find a balance that acknowledges both sides—perhaps by adjusting the rent amount or formalizing a chore-sharing arrangement—to maintain harmony and fairness going forward.

Jane Smith

Jane loves exploring new cultures and writing about travel and lifestyle.

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