As the cold grip of flu season approaches, a soon-to-be mother faces the fragile reality of protecting her unborn child. With a weakened immune system and a baby on the way in January, every precaution feels urgent, every choice weighted with love and fear.
Caught between medical advice and family beliefs, she and her partner navigate a delicate path, hoping to shield their child without fracturing the bonds they hold dear. In this quiet struggle, the heart’s yearning for safety clashes with the hope for harmony.

AITA for asking my immediate family to get the flu shot if they want to see our newborn in the hospital




As renowned pediatrician Dr. Sarah Sacks explains, “Vaccination in the peri-natal period, especially for those who will have close contact with the infant, is a critical component of cocooning strategies to protect newborns too young to be fully vaccinated themselves.”
The situation presented involves a conflict between evidence-based medical precaution and familial boundary setting. The OP is acting from a place of high protective instinct, which is entirely appropriate for expectant parents preparing for a newborn during peak flu season. The MIL’s stance—relying on personal anecdote (“I never get the flu”) and inaccurate information regarding infant immunity (newborns have passive immunity that wanes quickly, and breast milk antibodies take time to build)—demonstrates a misunderstanding of infant immunology and disease transmission risks. While enforcing medical compliance on adults is difficult, the parents have the primary responsibility for the child’s well-being. The MIL’s refusal, while perhaps stemming from discomfort or skepticism, directly challenges the protective environment the parents are trying to establish.
The OP’s action of asking for vaccinations was appropriate as it constituted a reasonable request for protection. Moving forward, instead of focusing on the necessity of the shot itself, the parents should clearly articulate the consequence of non-compliance—namely, limited visitation or specific safety protocols (like mask-wearing or social distancing) when the baby is born. This shifts the focus from policing the MIL’s body to managing the environment around the vulnerable infant.
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The original poster (OP) is experiencing significant anxiety regarding the health of their newborn, prioritizing preventative medical measures recommended by professionals, specifically concerning flu vaccination among close contacts. This places them in direct conflict with the mother-in-law (MIL), who dismisses these medical recommendations based on personal belief and perceived immunity, creating tension between the OP’s desire to protect their child and the wish to maintain family peace.
Given the conflicting priorities of expert medical advice versus familial harmony and individual autonomy, the central question remains: To what extent should new parents enforce medical safeguards on close family members, even if those requests cause interpersonal friction, and is the MIL’s refusal justifiable when balanced against the documented risks to a vulnerable newborn?







