A haunting silence lingers over a childhood shattered by unspeakable trauma and betrayal. After enduring the unimaginable pain of assault and the cruel judgment of those meant to protect her, she faced a harrowing choice alone. The very person who should have safeguarded her health instead wove deception into her suffering, withholding life-saving care and shattering trust in the most profound way.
Years later, the wounds remain raw, not just from the past but from the realization of a mother’s calculated cruelty. Betrayed by the one who should have been her refuge, she stands at the crossroads of despair and resilience, grappling with a storm of emotions that threaten to drown her. Yet, in this darkness, her voice rises, a testament to survival and the unyielding human spirit.
My entitled mother tried to make me infertile
Dr. Karyl McBride, an expert in narcissistic abuse recovery, often notes that surviving individuals raised by narcissistic parents frequently struggle with intense cognitive dissonance—the conflict between the reality of the abuse and the ingrained need to love or maintain a bond with that parent. This situation perfectly illustrates that dynamic: the author acknowledges their mother’s manipulative and dangerous behavior (narcissism/sociopathy) while simultaneously admitting to a residual, complicated love, which is a common feature of trauma bonding.
The mother’s actions—withholding necessary post-operative antibiotics, directly leading to infection and potential infertility—represent a severe breach of care, going beyond emotional abuse into physical endangerment. This was an act of extreme control and punishment, likely stemming from her inability to accept the initial trauma or the author’s autonomous choice regarding the pregnancy. The author’s decision to pursue no contact is a critical step in establishing firm boundaries necessary for psychological survival and healing from this level of calculated harm.
The author’s actions regarding the abortion were responsible, given the circumstances of assault, and their prioritization of their own health and autonomy was appropriate. Moving forward, the most constructive step is to maintain the planned no-contact boundary, focus on trauma recovery therapy specifically addressing medical betrayal and narcissistic abuse, and consciously decouple the concept of ‘mother’ from the concept of ‘caregiver’ or ‘loved one’ to fully process the depth of this final revelation.
AFTER THIS STORY DROPPED, REDDIT WENT INTO MELTDOWN MODE – CHECK OUT WHAT PEOPLE SAID.
I hope you do have family that will stand with you and by you. I put a parent behind me and it was one of the best things I could do. By putting nothing past their lunacy I cut off their ability to hurt me
The individual is experiencing profound shock and betrayal upon realizing their mother intentionally jeopardized their health and potential fertility following a traumatic experience. The core conflict lies between the author’s necessary self-preservation and their mother’s destructive, abusive actions, complicated by the author’s lingering, albeit conflicted, feelings of love for their parent.
Given this severe betrayal involving medical harm, is it ever ethically justifiable to maintain any relationship with a parent who actively worked to cause significant, long-term physical damage to their child, regardless of the biological tie?
