AITA for pretending to sleep all night just to catch my wife in a lie?

For the past few months, my wife has been complaining nonstop about our cats. She says they constantly wake her up, that she has to get up multiple times every night to open the door for them, and that they keep making noises or jumping on her. It got so bad that she started demanding I get rid of the cats. I told her I’ve never heard or seen any of this — she claims I just sleep through it all.

She said she’s losing sleep, getting more and more frustrated, and even threatened to leave me if I didn’t get rid of them. I honestly started considering giving the cats to my sister — until one morning, something didn’t add up.

She told me she got up multiple times during the night — listing specific times she said she opened the door or woke up because of the cats. But I’d been awake until 4am, and she claimed she was up at 1am, 3am, and several other times. I was in the bedroom the whole night, and I knew none of that happened.

So I ran a test. When she said she was going to bed, I let the cats out of the bedroom and pretended to fall asleep. I stayed awake, taking timestamps every 30 minutes on my phone and noting every cat noise. The cats made just two small noises — one jumped down at 3:18am, another ate quietly near the door at 4:57am. Nothing else.

The next morning, my wife claimed she’d woken up at least seven times to deal with the cats. I was furious. She was lying. I confronted her bluntly: “I stayed awake all night monitoring the cats. They weren’t even in the room. I have timestamps. You’ve been lying to get me to get rid of them. Why?”

She just sat silently, shaking and looking angry, then left the room. Hours later she came back and ignored me. When I asked how I’m the bad guy here, she said I treated her like a child by pretending to sleep and spying on her, and that using timestamps made me an obsessive a**hole.

I did it because she was threatening to make me get rid of my cats or leave me, and her story didn’t add up. So, AITA for doing this? Am I really obsessive for trying to catch her lying?

Here’s the comments of Reddit users:

KrymsinTyde said: NTA. That was gaslighting and manipulative. If she had issues with the cats, she should have said so directly.

Samwise3214 said: NTA, but you’ve kind of called her bluff about leaving now that you removed the cats as an excuse. Wishing you all the best.

Noodles_R said: NTA in my opinion—you had to test her. She’s trying to blackmail your relationship by forcing you to get rid of your pets. What’s your next move?

Leopard_Recent said: NTA, but I wonder if your wife has a sleep disorder. I suffer from insomnia and sometimes have vivid, realistic dreams that make it hard to tell what really happened during the night.

APotatoPancake said: NTA. Your wife is gaslighting you. You are not the obsessive a**hole—she is.

UhOhSleepyThrowaway said: Update: I kicked her out. She’s been in the bedroom for hours, watching YouTube, refusing to talk. Then she screamed at the cats and kicked the door, scaring them. I told her to leave and find somewhere else to stay. I tried to listen before, but she wanted none of it. I’m drained and done—for now.

Prechrchet said: NTA. Your wife’s claims don’t match the facts. She didn’t argue that you made a mistake, which tells me she knows she’s lying. Get a lawyer—you might need one.

hdmx539 said: NTA. Maybe your wife has a sleep problem like apnea or restless sleep. I thought my cats were waking me, but it was my mattress and arthritis. Next time, maybe observe her sleeping or suggest a sleep study. Sometimes people wake up without realizing. The sneaking around feels dishonest and probably broke trust. Instead of spying, you two should talk.

danigirl3694 said: NTA. No reason she’d lie about the cats unless she wants to leave you and make you do it or she just hates the cats. Those are the only reasons I can think of.

LunakKip said: NTA. She’s mad because she got caught. But the fact you had to do this shows trust issues. If you want to save the relationship, ask her gently why she lied and why she wants the cats gone. Trust and communication are key.