I (36M) have been married to my wife (34F) for five years. We have a 3-year-old son together. My wife is a neurologist and has been practicing for about four years. I also have a good job in management, though she earns roughly 30{39ca6eb452c0ce4419cd73a8f3bd18a23fe95ab4febb092bc2ab1b542eeea82f} more than I do.
Despite that, I cover almost all of our son’s expenses, and we split the rest of our bills 50/50.
Recently, my wife told me she wants to take a break from working — and not just a short one. She wants to take five full years off to “enjoy the fruits of her labor.” She said she feels like she’s spent her entire adult life chasing her career, under constant stress, and now wants to live freely — travel, hike, party, buy luxury items, etc.
I asked if she had enough savings to keep up with her share of the bills during this time, and she flat-out said no — she plans to use her savings exclusively on herself. She expects me to cover all household bills and our child’s expenses while she spends her own money on leisure.
When I pointed out that this would leave me with nearly no savings each month and put me in a position where I’d be living paycheck to paycheck, her response was that I could work overtime if needed. She didn’t seem to see an issue with that.
I was stunned. It felt like she had no regard for my well-being — emotionally or financially. I’ve already been covering more than my share despite earning less. And now she expects me to completely take on her responsibilities too, just so she can have a multi-year vacation?
So I told her: it’s her choice if she wants to stop working, but I will not be covering her half of the bills. I won’t burn myself out financially just so she can have fun with her own money. To me, that’s deeply unfair.
I reminded her that I’ve always stepped up — I’ve been covering everything for our son and splitting the bills evenly despite our income difference. Now she wants to stop contributing altogether and let me carry the full load while she travels and parties?
She got angry and started accusing me of not appreciating all the hard work she’s put in over the years. I do appreciate her — but this doesn’t feel like a partnership anymore.
So… AITA?
Check out how the community responded:
Bimmer9721 said:
My man, your wife just indirectly told you she wants a divorce. She basically said, “I don’t want to be married, I don’t like you very much, keep the kid, I want to live like I’m single.” That’s about as plain as it gets.
DMmeNiceTitties said:
NTA, but make sure you have a plan in case your wife says “f**k it” and quits anyway.
lydocia said:
“She wants to stop working for five years and spend her savings traveling, hiking, partying, buying expensive clothes…”
She’s acting like she wants to be single with no commitments — except she has a husband and a child.
More realistically, she should go to therapy and figure out what’s behind this identity crisis.
DankyMcJangles said:
You already sound like a single parent. You’d better file now while she still has income. NTA.
myZ2cents518 said:
Please tell me this isn’t real. People can’t actually be this awful, can they? WTF?!
Tell her to pound sand. File for divorce and custody — and since she earns more, go for alimony and child support.
sw33tcruky said:
This seems fake.
DontWasteMyTime2121 said:
File for divorce and custody now. Take her for child support and make her give you the house.
Disastrous_Sthe said:
Next update: “My wife quit her job and threatened to divorce me and file for child support if I don’t do what she wants.”
Final update: “I stayed because I didn’t want to break up the family, even if it meant working myself to d**th.”
Good luck, OP.
Holiday_Newspaper_29 said:
Check to check? Your highly educated wife is going to blow all her money on clothes and fun?
Nice creative writing, mate… but this feels obviously fake.
alwaysonesteptoofar said:
I’m going to be that guy and say it — this sounds fake as f**k.
